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Oscars

The B-Movie King and Oscar Night

By Jordy "Ray" Purlky, Jr. | Sunday, March 5, 2006, 11:32 PM

The Atlanta Journal-Constitution

OK, so the Oscars are over. Is it just me, or:

Did all those old Westerns I grew up watching as a kid NOT look as gay as they did in the clips Jon Stewart showed at the start?

Does “Crash” winning best picture mean people can finally STOP with the “Brokeback Mountain” parodies?

Could Joaquin Phoenix look any LESS thrilled to see Reese Witherspoon win best actress? (Same for her husband, Ryan what’s-his-name, too.)

Didn’t you wish the orchestra actually DID get up and attack Oscar winners when they yammered on too long?

When you win an Oscar aren’t you supposed to act like you didn’t expect it? But the British guys who won for “Wallace & Gromit” had little bow ties to put on their statues. Then there were the Frenchies who lugged big stuffed penguins with them when they won for, yep, “March of the Penguins.” Maybe it’s a foreign thing.

Were Lily Tomlin and Meryl Streep really stoned when they presented Robert Altman’s honorary Oscar?

And were the members of Three 6 Mafia also really — oh, never mind. They HAD to be.

So what did y’all think about the Oscars this year?

Should Jon Stewart get a second invite?

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