Access Atlanta > Entertainment > Radio Talk > Archives > 2009 > February > 01 > Entry
2/2: Steve Harvey interview for his book, “Act Like a Lady, Think Like a Man.”
The Atlanta Journal-Constitution
Atlanta resident since 2007, Steve Harvey is insanely popular. I heard recent book signings in other cities has drawn upward to 2,000 people. Fortunately, he is doing three different book signings in the area over the next three weeks. Get there early, people, or you won’t get your five seconds with Harvey:
BOOK SIGNINGS
Monday at 6 p.m. at Wal-Mart, 1785 Cobb Parkway S. Marietta. 770-955-0626
Tuesday, 7 p.m at Barnes & Noble, 2900 Peachtree Road N.E. Atlanta, 404-261-7747 (Get there at 5 p.m. for passes to guarantee a spot in line, with a cutoff at 500 people.)
Feb. 9 at 7 p.m. at Stonecrest Mall Borders, 8000 Stonecrest Mall Parkway, Lithonia. 678-526-2550
I’ve interviewed the man several times over the years but I’m honestly not sure if he even knows who I am. But he knows how to promote himself. And his relationships book “Act Like a Lady, Think Like a Man” is really good. It’s a straight-talk express for women to understand the simplicity that is man and how to find a good one.
He told me how much he and his family enjoys living in Atlanta after moving here 18 months ago. And he’s psyched to be over at 107.5 soon (plus a future simulcast at 97.5) instead of the weak signal at 102.5, where he has done amazingly well.
Here’s the story that will run in Monday’s print edition:
Atlanta resident Steve Harvey’s a standup comic who can sell out Philips Arena. His syndicated TV show is still in regular rerun rotation. And he’s now one of the hottest radio personalities in the country.
Even on the very weak signal at Grown Folks 102.5 the past two years, Harvey has been able to be competitive with Tom Joyner at rival Kiss 104.1. And now Radio One Atlanta is about to give Harvey a power boost by moving him to 107.5, which switched this week from smooth jazz to R&B.
Harvey said he’s also going to be simulcast at some point on 97.5, which is currently gospel. (The gospel signal may move to 102.5.) “We’re looking very, very forward to this big signal,” he said.
And now he can add “author” to his resume thanks to his book “Act Like a Lady, Think Like a Man,” a relationship advice book for women written in plain Harvey speak and minus all the annoying Dr. Phil-like therapist jargon. It’s much like the “Strawberry Letter 23” segment on his radio show in which he and co-host Shirley give listeners no-nonsense advice about parenting, work, family and relationships. And though Harvey is usually funny, the book is more serious.
“This is not a clinical study of men,” he said. “It’s real-life experience from my friends, from all walks of life.”
The book, which came out Tuesday , is already a best-seller. On Friday, it was ranked No. 5 on Amazon.com.
Detroit author Sylvia M. Hubbard has been writing a blog called “How To Love a Black Woman” since 2005. She reads 50 relationship books a year and appreciates Harvey’s “bare-bones truth” approach in his new book.
“I like that he has a close personal bond with the reader,” Hubbard said Friday. “And he doesn’t just lecture us. He made it funny. Sometimes you feel bad after reading relationship books. That’s not the case here.”
Here’s a sampling of the book’s tenets with comments from Harvey, who spoke to us last week:
To snag good men, women need to set expectations up front: “Why don’t they do it? They’re worried they’ll scare them away. We play on that as men. We use that to our advantage so we can get what we want.”
Three things that define a man: who they are (a title such as CEO or artist), what they do and how much they make: “I’m a standup comic. That’s what I do. Who I am is how far up the ladder I am in the standup world. Do I sell out concerts or am I just a club act? How big I am also helps define how much I make. This is what defines me, drives me.”
Three things men want from women: support, loyalty and “the cookie”: “We’ll take a lot of things from a woman. But we have to have these three things. You take away any one of them, you lose a man’s affection. If we discover you’re not loyal, you’re kicking it with how many dudes? It’s over. If you don’t believe in what I’m doing or can’t see yourself attaching yourself to my plans, that’s not good either. And we need the cookie. Everybody likes some form of cookie. That’s what sex is. I want to see how long a relationship will last without the cookie.”
Three ways men show love to women: profess, provide and protect: “We have to define love in some kind of way. The problem with women is they have this great spectrum of what love is, and they want it reciprocated the same way they give it out. But we men can only nurture to a certain degree. It’s not in our DNA … We want to profess our love. We tell everyone. This is my baby’s mama. This is my gal. This is my lady! We also want to provide for you. Maybe you can’t buy her a car but he can help you rent a car. Or he can get the one you have fixed. We’ll do what we can to take care of you. It’s also about protecting you. Nobody can say anything about you sideways without us reacting. Defend and protect. That’s our love in a nutshell.”
Questions to ask a man to decide if they are worth keeping: “You have the right to know his short-term goals and whether they match his long-term goals. If you don’t want that type of life, you need to kill this right now. You need to know his views on family and kids, his relationship with his mom. You also have to know what he thinks of you and how he feels about you. What’s the difference? I can tell you what I think of her in 60 seconds. But how I feel about her? That’s the answer you have to really think about. If you can’t answer it, you haven’t put enough thought into the relationship.”
Comments
By Opto
February 2, 2009 3:35 PM | Link to this
I really resent being expected to read a book written by a man who’s on his THIRD marriage.
If he were a woman with the same marital stats writing a book on how to snag a good woman, the African American community would be UP IN ARMS.
Seeing as how I’m the first commenter on this story and hit hit yesterday, maybe people aren’t taking Steve that seriously after all.
By Opto
February 2, 2009 3:38 PM | Link to this
I really resent being expected to read a book written by a man who’s on his THIRD marriage.
If he were a woman with the same marital stats writing a book on how to snag a good woman, the African American community would be UP IN ARMS.
Seeing as how I’m the first commenter on this story and hit hit yesterday, maybe people aren’t taking Steve that seriously after all.
By Valrie Gallion
February 2, 2009 4:56 PM | Link to this
Steve,
Congratulations on your book. I’ll be purchasing it…
God Bless, Valrie Gallion Baltimore, Md
By Valrie Gallion
February 2, 2009 5:01 PM | Link to this
Steve,
Congratulations on your book. I’ll be purchasing it…
God Bless, Valrie Gallion Baltimore, Md
By Richard Fuller
February 3, 2009 9:24 AM | Link to this
i got an autographed copy of Steve Harvey’s “Act Like a Lady, Think Like a Man.” - enlightening reading it is definitely from a man with experiences. A relationship textbook.
By Mr. Ed
February 3, 2009 11:13 AM | Link to this
Steve, you’ve made your blood line proud.
Gotta go now, it’s time for some grain and oats.
By Carlos
February 4, 2009 3:31 AM | Link to this
Three things that define a man: who they are (a title such as CEO or artist), what they do and how much they make:
What about a man’s character, personality, behavior, attitude?
I think too many times (especially in the black community) too much focus is on status rather than character. Like “Who I am is how far up the ladder I am” as Stave Harvey puts it. Baloney.
By Dholl
February 5, 2009 5:45 PM | Link to this
What does him being married three times have to do with him telling women how men are? He didn’t say he was an expert on marriage. But who better to say how women may run off a man than a man who has had 3 wives!
By Wendy
February 5, 2009 7:41 PM | Link to this
Please. He’s run off with his publicist and been married times. He needs to learn what a man is.
He is trying to be like Michael-I wrote a book that made me famous- Baisden.
What you do and what you make doesn’t define who you are. He sounds like a rapper!!
Proof that your aren’t smart just because you are famous.
I agree with the first poster
By PEACHES
February 12, 2009 11:32 AM | Link to this
I LOVE THE MORNING SHOW AND I WILL BE BUYING YOUR BOOK YOU ARE BLESS
By barbara
February 12, 2009 3:14 PM | Link to this
Who better an a man to tell a wonman how a man thinks and what they want. You want to know something about a man ask a man. If you are a woman. that’s what I do.I go to other man.
By Yolanda
February 14, 2009 6:28 AM | Link to this
It is clear that many of you who took the time to respond are haters.
This book is not about “How to Have the Perfect Marriage”. It is about relationships and how men think (regading women). Who better to tell us that than a man WITH experience?
Even the point about three “I do’s”, Steve Harvey is a very different man since the first one.
A man is not “defined” by title but his worth in his work…and that did not start as a Steve Harvey-ism. God gave Adam work (to name every thing on earth) before He gave him a wife. He was created to be a provider and protector. His work will help him do that.
Congratulations Steve! Keeping on doing you and may God continue to blow your mind and bless you with an Ephesians 3:20!
NEXT CALLER>>>>
By Kim
February 16, 2009 11:21 AM | Link to this
I am suprised at how many women are hating on Steve. He did not ever say he was perfect. He is just a man who is giving information to women about men. If you dont like it dont buy it, but what right do you have to judge. Just curious to know how many, if any, marriages you have had.
By Kim
February 16, 2009 11:22 AM | Link to this
I am suprised at how many women are hating on Steve. He did not ever say he was perfect. He is just a man who is giving information to women about men. If you dont like it dont buy it, but what right do you have to judge. Just curious to know how many, if any, marriages you have had.
By Joan Andrea
February 25, 2009 9:00 AM | Link to this
There is nothing which says you have to believe and practise what Steve is recommending. But information from many different perspectives is always good. It is for you to sift through the information and see what works for you. Steve, I’m gonna buy the book. Frankly if you had been on your tenth marriage it would have mande you even more qualified.
By Robin White
February 28, 2009 11:28 AM | Link to this
I Thank God for Steve Harvey & his new book it has empowered me as woman of God along with my studies in the Word of God. I have purchased this book for my daughter (Tangela)because I want her be empowered as well and I have shared what I have learned from reading this book with other women to empower them and to raise our standards as strong Black Women. I think it is time to re-strengthen our black families and let black men now that we need their present in the home to lead,provide & protrct his family. I trust God for the right man that i need in my life. I am truly more empowered now than I’ve ever been in my life. I thank The Lord and I thank him Steve’s new book. Be blessed ladies and let’s get where we nned to be spiritually and glorify God.
By Darrell
March 6, 2009 10:27 AM | Link to this
I think the book is on point for the most part, but some of his points are PURELY his opinions. There is no way you can begin to convince me that there is no such thing as a gold digger, Its A FOOL who believes that!!