Misadventures in Atlanta

By Raqi

September 6, 2006 08:25 AM | Link to this

“…my question to you is how you change your dating behaviors based on the existence and widespread nature of the virus.”

Knowledge is power. Until the vast majority recognizes that this problem is real and it is not going away, it will always be a problem. It is overwhelming at the number of individuals that are of the mind set that if it has not hit my door step then it’s not my problem, au contraire, it is a National…better yet a Universal problem. We must educate our kids in the practice of safe sex and self control and responsibility. We must not lay down with every Jack, Jill or Jock that pays us some attention. We must get tested and require testing.

By Prince Charming

September 6, 2006 08:26 AM | Link to this

Being that I grew up in the age of HIV/AIDS, I have always practiced safe sex when dating. I also get tested regularly and openly offer anyone to see my HIV negative status/results. I don’t press for paperwork as hard as I should but it is a question that is asked prior to sex and during a relationship.

HIV would factor into my consideration on dating a person and definitely on a one night stand. But I wouldn’t disqualify a person for their status, I’d just want to know that they are taking care of themselves with the best information and medication available and that they are taking precautions not to transmit the virus to others.

It would take a lot of time before I would consider a relationship with someone who is HIV but not impossible. If we were involved and they did not honestly tell me their status and I found out they were positive, I would break up with them almost immediately because A) now I cannot trust you B) you liked to me and C) you put my life in jeopardy so how much do you really care about me?

By LorDemi

September 6, 2006 08:47 AM | Link to this

Morning All

said as I walkit into work latathenamutha

Laney no more one nighters for me…testing is a must…I’ll show you my papers, will you show me yours?

By 4theLongHaul

September 6, 2006 09:02 AM | Link to this

Hey Y’all Decided to come to work today. I give blood to the American Red Cross every 3 months. Therefore, my blood is tested every three months. And me & SO are practicing abstinence (as hard as it isssss), even while exclusively dating. Of course, we’ve had our moments where we fell off the wagon from time to time and we were protected.

By Just plain tired

September 6, 2006 09:09 AM | Link to this

Hello everyone,

I have a long, tiring weekend and Diva you must know my family. Anyway, a family member is dying. He says he has cancer but I know his life style - he is bisexual. He is very attractive, tall, green-eyes and likes both men and women. I know everyone wants to blast him, but he had a terrible, I mean terrible childhood and says he does not know why he likes men and women. AIDS is a reality and black women, it is up to us to protect ourselves as well as our children. For those of you with teenagers, please talk to them because they do not really believe in the horror of AIDS and think it could never touch them. Black women make men wear condoms even if you are married to them (which is a shame).

Men stop being so trifling - get tested. If you have been with another man, leave us women alone.

And just look at Africa - women and children the main sufferers. Virgin girls are being raped because ignorant a* men think that that is the cure for the virus. Let me stop. I have being reading a lot of books about slavery and so forth and it just seems to me that the black woman has and is doubly oppressed.

Black men, stop using the master tools. Okay, I am going to stop before I start on a different topic.

By JustMe

September 6, 2006 09:14 AM | Link to this

Good Morning Laney and All - GREAT TOPIC

Lot’s of questions today

my question to you is how you change your dating behaviors based on the existence and widespread nature of the virus.

My dating behaviors have not needed to change per se, I have always been very particular about the men that I become involved with, even if intimacy is not part of the “ship” we build, my father told me in my pre-teen years to be very selective of men, and I have always heeded that information.

Does HIV factor into your considerations about being sexually involved with someone, whether for a one-night stand or a relationship?

HIV does factor into my considerations when deciding to be active with a guy (new or old). If the guy has revealed that he has had one night stands, or slept with women who needed money or regulary engaged in any other promiscuous behaviors, then depending on a few other factors, I may or may not become sexual active with the guy. - other factors being things like, current state of morals, hygeine, regular/routine Dr. visits, oral hygeine, living conditions, employability status.

How about your decision to choose a partner in general — are you more or less likely to choose a certain “type” of partner because of the risk of HIV?

I have long since given up on the super coll guys, just give JustMe and average everyday ordinary guy, and I’m good. I tend to like the quiet/dauym near nerdy type guys. You know the ones who didn’t get that much action in HS and college cause they just hadn’t grown into themselves yet.

Would you consider entering into a relationship with someone who was HIV-positive? I know folks say never say never, but I think this question comes pretty close to making it ok to say NEVER!

What would you do if you found out that your partner had HIV or AIDS after you were already involved? FIrst off I would get tested again (I get tested every year and sometimes 2x - LOL at the GYN and the PCP) Make a banana and split, especially if they knew they were infected. This also goes back to my previous post(s) about always asking a guy if he has had sex with other men, used IV drugs, or had sex with ladies of the night.

Have you had experience with the “down low” phenomenon? Do you believe it to exist and be a significant risk? I personally have not dated a guy who was on teh DL or found out something like that after the fact. It is alive and well in the ATL and in America. THere is a significant risk inviolved to all parties trapped in this type of relationship. The unsuspecting woman (race aside) is having unprotected sex with her SO/Spouse not knowing that he is dilly dallying with a 3rd party (it does not just have to be another man) all it takes is for 1 dirty low down (insert expletive here) to contract something and pass it on like a common cold, and the sweet little innocent, faithful, loyal woman is stuck with an incurable disease because dude couldn’t keep his johnson local, he had to be international, and Mr. Playa Playa……. now fanning myself, infidelity makes me mad as a hatter

By JustMe

September 6, 2006 09:19 AM | Link to this

JPTired Men stop being so trifling - get tested. If you have been with another man, leave us women alone. - Let the Church say AMEN! >>>>>>>Disclaimer - If there are any Bi men out there who want to plead their case(s), we’d all love to blog about it.

JPTired - LOl seems like this is a hot topic with you too - LOL I found myself starting to rant……… faning myself again

By LorDemi

September 6, 2006 09:20 AM | Link to this

4theLongHaul …give blood to the American Red Cross every 3 months. Therefore, my blood is tested every three months

You are supposed to have your blood tested before donating to Red Cross. I’ve dating a few cute nurses that work for Red Cross…Many times they’ll just throw your blood away, without even calling you…Yes your blood is tested thoroughly, but will they call and tell you…Maybe, maybe not.

Oh I use do the same by the way…

By Blue_Kolla

September 6, 2006 09:27 AM | Link to this

What up good peeps

Yeap, HIV is alive and kicking, so no, I will not hit… if the draws are too easy to get.

As far as “type”, there’s more involved because this disease is not type-specific. It attacks across all lines of gender, class, etc. You can’t just look at a person and tell that they’re carrying. There are plenty of nice looking good girls that have That Package.

Personally I don’t want to meet anyone with HIV/AIDS. I would hate to really be into them and find out. You set yourself up for a lot of pain down the road, just in seeing that person get sick, barely make it back, get sick again, barely make it back, etc.

Bottom Line: I’m with Demi - I NEED TO SEE YOUR PAPERWORK SLIM.

By C tha 1

September 6, 2006 09:27 AM | Link to this

One thing I will give my ex-girlfriend credit for is that she helped me get over my fear of being tested for HIV/AIDS. I knew she had not been with half as many partners as I have had, but somehow she put me at ease in the fact of me knowing my status. I did it because I knew I loved her, and we did become active before I was tested (which may have been the wrong way) I was terrified my past would come back to haunt me. Hell, in my messed up mind I probably could have handled that, but I couldn’t handle messing up her life too…so I got tested. Would it have been grounds for breakup if I were positive…I don’t know, we had alot of issues. But I can say I was monogamous for a year and a half, so infidelity wasn’t the issue.

Since then I’ve been tested two other times (once last year, and this past March) and thank God I’m still negative. Honestly, I’ve dramatically slowed down my sexual activity, and I’m at peace with myself for knowing my status. At thirty years of age I’m thankful to have escaped, sidestepped, and just plain avoided the stastical traps that say I’m supposed to basically be broke and die in jail.

And right now I’m not as put off when a woman wants to wait until she sex comes into the picture. Still, the waiting until marriage issue is a much larger step I haven’t gotten to yet. Real talk, sex can certainly be a good thing, and as a man it is very hard for me to ignore my sex drive…especially if I’m really feeling you. But, because I’ve been around the block I know what’s out there. And I see alot of “supposedly” good sistahs and other women get down w/ some of the most suspect dudes for whatever reason. And I may be wrong, but if I notice a woman I been diggin get down w/ suspects…hey I’m sorry I just gotta move on. I’m like Uncle Ruckus from the Boondocks, “Don’t trust dem new n#*&as ova there”.

By SeanJohnson

September 6, 2006 09:28 AM | Link to this

I have taken 2 test one pretty recently both were negative..I have never been the type to just go raw without protection..can honestly say in the last 10 years only had unprotected sex with 2 females. So i have been responsible for my own safety by wearing a condom with the others. Another thing I would like to add is that I can count on both hands how many females have ever as me to wear protection..i took it upon myself…for health reasons and not wanting to get someone pregnant that i wasnt exclusive with.. To defend black men…the whole DL thing is propaganda…so i guess we are sxual terrorist know??? We all need to take full responsibility for our OWN actions and stop blaming each other..

By JustMe

September 6, 2006 09:30 AM | Link to this

Demi I read your post yesterday about cutting some trees……….. you are so crazy!

By abc

September 6, 2006 09:30 AM | Link to this

My demographic and lifestyle makes AIDS a very minimal risk, IMHO. I would definitely say that black women are at severe risk from the DL phenomenon.

Not much else to contribute to the topic…

By ImAPeach404

September 6, 2006 09:32 AM | Link to this

@4th & Laney…Is that really true about giving blood and them testing it. I mean, I realize they test your blood, but would they tell you if you were infected???

I use to think this was acceptable testing w/out actually getting tested until somone told me that they will test the blood, but they don’t let you know if the test comes back positive. So then I was like “Well, they keep sending me mail about the next blood drives. They wouldn’t do that if it was bad”. My friend suggested I get tested just in case.

By Darkbuty

September 6, 2006 09:36 AM | Link to this

Good Morning Everyone

Have you had experience with the “down low” phenomenon? Do you believe it to exist and be a significant risk?

I witnessed a couple of girlfriends deal with that situation. I knew instantly when I met the guy that he was flaming. She had a party and 2 people pulled her aside to tell her that the man was gay…I waited and called her the next morning and told her that he was flaming!

She was in denial for a period…took him to church and the Preacher told her that he looked a little suspicious. But she couldn’t deny the fact that he could NEVER get it up and could not consumate the relationship/situation everytime they went to bed…

My stylist and I are VERY cool and he tells me about all the married men that hit on him. He tells me about the men he’s been with in the past and who are now married….it’s really scary!

I think alot of black men are in denial about how pervasive this phenomenom is…my BF keeps saying he doesn’t believe it because he doesn’t know any guys that are on the DL…I tell him that’s the point…YOU’RE NOT SUPPOSE TO KNOW!!

By Just plain tired

September 6, 2006 09:37 AM | Link to this

@Just Me You read those books and then hear some of the stuff men (black men) are thinking and how they are treating black women, you would think that black women did not suffer before, during and after slavery. Then theys always screaming about independent black women and do not have a clue as to why she is independent. Because you feel as if the only power you have is ruling her. You think you the only one being marginalized - yet you want to hurt me as if I am the one causing you pain. Oh girl, let me stop. Women wake up. If you are living in the project - get out do not get tied up with some no-good-aint-got-nothing-aint-never-going-to-have-nothing-wanna-be-playa. Because a true man is always thinking about getting out as well as knows these projects are just designed for rats in a maze. Focus on your career - dick is going be around long after you get your degree.

By 4theLongHaul

September 6, 2006 09:39 AM | Link to this

As for the Red Cross donation, because I am a registered donor who is constantly CALLED upon to donate, I couldn’t see me having infected blood, but yet they continue to reach out to me to consistently donate. You sign a form that DOES state that if your blood is unacceptable for any reason, they WILL contact you. So I don’t believe they’re just throwing blood away without notifying donors. Like I said, I’m actually registered with them, have the card, whole nine. So they have a history of my blood donations for the past ten years.

By 4theLongHaul

September 6, 2006 09:41 AM | Link to this

@ ImAPeach404. I will agree with you that it never is a bad idea to get additional testings and as someone earlier stated, I get my blood tested by other means at least once a year also.

By Darkbuty

September 6, 2006 09:56 AM | Link to this

@Peach- The Red Cross will send you a letter stating that your blood is unacceptable and to contact your physician…they won’t tell you the reason why…..it doesn’t necessarily have to be just because of HIV.

By ImAPeach404

September 6, 2006 09:57 AM | Link to this

@JustMe… It doesn’t matter if he had a one night stand, one month stand, or was married, any and every body is a potential carrier of the disease. You can ask every question, present every scenrio, check his papers from earlier this year… if he fails to tell you about that one time at band camp, you’re screwed!

And you know, most nerds go to band camp :-)

By Prince Charming

September 6, 2006 10:02 AM | Link to this

@ Sean, the women are going to get you for that last comment! I agree with you but the D/L brothas need to speak up and let women know what’s going on with them. If you care about someone, you should be honest in a relationship. Give her the choice to deal with the man. It’s not fair to take away anyone’s choices.

@ LorDemi & 4the long…, don’t rely on the Red Cross, GET TESTED! And I honestly say that out of love for all my people. You may be right about the Red Cross, but suppose you are not? They may be taking tainted blood and using it or selling it elsewhere.

@ Darkbuty, your girlfriend is lucky he could not consummate the relationship. Most times, that is not the case. I would be more suspect about the preacher. I thought they do not judge people? He could have told her his suspicions in another more Christian way.

@ Just plain, You said a mouthful. But keep in mind, black men have a journey that you as a black woman will never truly understand. Just constantly seeing and reading negativity about you as a black man on a daily basis is enough for even a strong minded brother to want to give up. But each day we stand tall, no matter who and what is out there against us. With this issue, we are loosing our women. The strongest and best ting we have going for us. How do you think this makes a good man feel?

By Raqi

September 6, 2006 10:06 AM | Link to this

Does no one else see the irony of expecting a “one night stand” to actually tell the truth? How trustworthy is a person that is willing to have sex with a perfect stranger?

By LorDemi

September 6, 2006 10:06 AM | Link to this

To defend black men…the whole DL thing is propaganda…so I guess we are sexual terrorist now???

LOL- I agree…

4theLongHaul I wasn’t questioning you sweetie (hell naw never that), but do you really want 1 million of infectize peeps to be tested in the manner?

ImAPeach404 you are correct, if you are clean, you will be ask to comeback…But it’s good to know before hand.

JustMe I pray for God to send my shade now…Ms. Kym mess my head up talking about the Amazons

The most woman-up statement of the morning: Focus on your career - dick is going be around long after you get your degree!!!

By Laney

September 6, 2006 10:09 AM | Link to this

4 - I’m not sure about the Red Cross. But people are lazy everywhere and I am sure some nurses throw away blood rather than delivering bad news.

For everyone, you can get tested in only 20 minutes now with the new oral method — it doesn’t even require drawing blood. So if you have any doubts, do it!

The stat that really alarmed me? The number of people who go in for an HIV test and never pick up their results…and are positive. Most tests are anonymous or confidential (those are different: check which your clinic is), so that means there is someone out there walking around who definitely has HIV, suspects it but doesn’t know for sure, and the clinic has no way to get a hold of them.

By 4theLongHaul

September 6, 2006 10:15 AM | Link to this

Prince I thought they do not judge people? He could have told her his suspicions in another more Christian way

That ain’t judging. That’s calling what walks and quacks like a duck, a duck. I WANT my pastor to be upfront and honest with me, seeing that it is his God-given duty to watch over me. Saying someone looked a little suspicious was his honest opinion and him showing concern for his female parishioner. Judging would’ve been, “that brutha ain’t right and he going hell”, knowing absolutely nothing about the guy. And seeing that he should have spiritual discernment, it would’ve been very irresponsible of him to not state so, seeing that she presented the guy to him.

By LorDemi

September 6, 2006 10:15 AM | Link to this

I think a lot of black men are in denial about how pervasive this phenomenon is…my BF keeps saying he doesn’t believe it because he doesn’t know any guys that are on the DL…I tell him that’s the point…YOU’RE NOT SUPPOSE TO KNOW!!

thick well said

…But why was sister girl in such denial about sugar tank man?

By Darkbuty

September 6, 2006 10:19 AM | Link to this

Raqi Does no one else see the irony of expecting a “one night stand” to actually tell the truth? How trustworthy is a person that is willing to have sex with a perfect stranger?

I see the irony in your question…what does a one night stand have to do with not being honest? Where is the lie or pretense in a one night stand?

By 4theLongHaul

September 6, 2006 10:19 AM | Link to this

Demi Oh, no offense taken sir. I just know I’m responsible for me and I know my status.

That is sad/crazy that people get tested but are too afraid to get the results though. I’m sure for every one person that knows they’re infected, there are three that don’t know. NOW THAT’S SCARY!!!

By LorDemi

September 6, 2006 10:28 AM | Link to this

With this issue, we are loosing our women. The strongest and best thing we have going for us. How do you think this makes a good man feel?

Like shyt…Just plain please remember that…I feel your anger, I truly do. Just remember, there are more good men than bad…Its the bad boys time to shine now, but you best to believe the real Kings will shine again and again

By ImAPeach404

September 6, 2006 10:34 AM | Link to this

@abc…What in the world??? My demographic and lifestyle makes AIDS a very minimal risk, IMHO.

Pretty, pretty please explain this to me

By Just plain tired

September 6, 2006 10:34 AM | Link to this

@Prince Charming See, right there, that there is the problem - But keep in mind, black men have a journey that you as a black woman will never truly understand.

What journey? The problem, not just with black men but a lot of PEOPLE is this need to divide and separate in order to define who they are: a white man is this and black man is that and white woman is this and a black women is that. When we all need to just focus on being PEOPLE. But when crabs are trapped in a bucket, they have the tendency to pull each other down. Women haven’t done anything for the black man by continuing to allow him sing that same sad song. Attention: black women if you have children or planning to have children, please break this cycle: raising your sons to be taken care of and your daughters to be survivors. Everyone, raise all your children to be independent and survivors maybe then we can get beyond this need to divide inorder to define.

By LorDemi

September 6, 2006 10:34 AM | Link to this

Just plain its ok to curse, but block some letters out…your a$$ gonna git lil’demi in trouble

By Darkbuty

September 6, 2006 10:38 AM | Link to this

4Long Your response to Prince was on point…I didn’t see it as judgemental as all, but his obligation. I didn’t quote him verbatim, I wasn’t there. My girlfriend told me what he said…and she wasn’t offended.

Demi I think she just really wanted someone to love and love her….it’s the only excuse I could think of. She wanted to believe him. She told him that several people thought he was gay. His response was I know that people think I’m gay, but I don’t care. I told my girl that I didn’t know of a black man that would be okay with so many people thinking he was gay.

By C tha 1

September 6, 2006 10:38 AM | Link to this

^5 Demi,

There are a few good men left, I’m one of them. I don’t seek validation for that either. I just hope God is pleased with the life I live.

Sometimes women can fool themselves about the type of men they are with. And women in general seem to have a problem with looking themselves in the mirror and analyzing their decisions when it comes to their personal lives and who they decide to share it with.

By Lil demi

September 6, 2006 10:39 AM | Link to this

4theLongHaul U shall now be called Aun-T

I can feel it now…with your eyes fill with fury, both arms rise high in the sky…calling forth lightening to smite lil demi

By abc

September 6, 2006 10:41 AM | Link to this

I don’t go to bars and clubs, I don’t do one night stands (okay, I was tempted last week, but I called that off), I get tested and insist that a partner does also. I’ve never been in jail. I’m a 48 year old upper middle class suburbanite. My exposure is minimal, so the risk is minimal.

By SeanJohnson

September 6, 2006 10:42 AM | Link to this

@ Justplaintiredandtalkingoutthesideofyourneck….I know you are hurt and passionate about this topic…but your comment about not dividing and seperating is really contradicting your very first post this morning..

By JustMe

September 6, 2006 10:43 AM | Link to this

SeanJ To defend black men…the whole DL thing is propaganda…so i guess we are sxual terrorist know???

Yeah we know about the Boyz club - Stick together at all costs - WTFE Dude. If you don’t know the DL is alive a kicking then you must live in a bubble. The last interview Peter Jennings did before his death was here in Atlanta, and he interviewd several men who were living 2x lives married/bi-sexual, married/HIV+, gave their spouse HIV etc. You usually read like a pretty smart dude, get you head out of your azz today and recognize. Just because you suit up to swim doesn’t mean all of your male counterparts do the same, and some of them-thug-4-lyfe dudes are gay as all out doors, but you’d never know it watching them play basketball and football or working out lifting weights etc - that’s why it called on the WHAT????? DOWN LOW

JPTired If you are living in the project - get out do not get tied up with some no-good-aint-got-nothing-aint-never-going-to-have-nothing-wanna-be-playa Gurl, this is going on everywhere from Bankhead to Buckhead - it not just a project problem anymore!

Darkbuty My stylist I have been looking for a guy to be my stylist……. can you make a referral?

Ima404 You can ask every question, present every scenrio, check his papers from earlier this year… if he fails to tell you about that one time at band camp, you’re screwed! True dat, but never-the-less, he’ll have to be liar then cause I do ask.

Prince Give her the choice to deal with the man. It’s not fair to take away anyone’s choices. You said a mouthful!

With this issue, we are loosing our women. The strongest and best ting we have going for us. How do you think this makes a good man feel? I have never heard a man on this blog admit that women are the best thing going for men - Thank you Brutha!

Demi You just lost all your cool points for agreeing with SeanJ

By SeanJohnson

September 6, 2006 10:46 AM | Link to this

@ C tha 1…man i am feeling your post

Sometimes women can fool themselves about the type of men they are with. And women in general seem to have a problem with looking themselves in the mirror and analyzing their decisions when it comes to their personal lives and who they decide to share it with.

that is real.

By Just plain tired

September 6, 2006 10:53 AM | Link to this

@Lord It is not so much about this issue right here but this issue just shows that everyone has placed the black women on the bottom of the totem pole (lets use and abuse her). And instead of praising her efforts to survive in this world, black men are complaining about her job, her independence, her attitude, her mean mugging, her high standards. All he is focused on is how can I ride your back to where he has to go (SELFISH B). And if we are both successful, he wants you to quit your job, raise his children, clean his house and his dirty “draws” and cook his meal (because a woman that loves her man cooks for him - bullshyt). Just gets on my nerves when people define love by what you DO for them. Or if he is successful, he starts throwing up in the black woman face that beauty is not black, it’s Asian, it’s Brazilian and so on. I do not have a problem with anyone dating whoever but my problem is when you have to justify your actions by saying the black woman is not this or does not do this. Now, we are on the bottom of the totem pole trying to survive AIDS/HIV as well as racism, sexism,and so on. If there is no more “us” then there is no “you,” but maybe that is what you want then you can forget where you came from and blend in with the majority eventually.

By Lil demi

September 6, 2006 10:53 AM | Link to this

The most painfulish (a made up word) statement of the morning: Demi I think she just really wanted someone to love and love her…

Nearly brought tears to my eyes…

Darkbuty I guess some brothers enjoys being sissified…Why? I have no idea

By Darkbuty

September 6, 2006 10:55 AM | Link to this

@ Just Is that aol account real? If so…mail call for my stylist’s number.

@ SeanJ…LOL…stop changing people’s name!!!

By Jewel

September 6, 2006 10:56 AM | Link to this

Good morning Everyone! Hope all had a safe and enjoyable holiday weekend!

WOW! A lot of thought provoking questions. If you do not know your status, these questions should prompt you to change that. I am in an exclusive relationship and as long as we remain that way, HIV/AIDS will not be a concern. I have not had a personal experience with the DL phenomenon, but I do believe that it exists. I had two primary questions when I initially met a man: 1) Are you married? 2) Are you on the DL? Of course their answers would be no if they wanted to run game. But I not only listened to what they said, but also how they answered and my gut instinct. My way of weeding out the riff raff. I quickly proceeded to say that I am not here to judge, but if that is your lifestyle, tell me and let me decide if I want to be a part of it. I don’t, so it is best that you find someone who does. But like someone said, you are not supposed to know. It is the ones who have crafted the cover-up that you have to worry about.

Last year I began volunteering with a hospice organization. The first patient I visited was a 33 year old black woman with AIDS. That was the first time I had seen someone with AIDS up close and personal. It was unnerving, to say the least. She died last January, leaving a 13 year old daughter and family who loved her. AIDS is real.

FYI-There is a health summit this Saturday, September 9, 10 am – 3 pm, @ the West End Mall. The target audience is men over 21. Free Health screenings include prostate and colorectal cancer, blood pressure, diabetes, cholesterol, and HIV.

Have a Powerful, Productive and Positive Day!

By The Divine Ms. Kym

September 6, 2006 10:56 AM | Link to this

Good Morning All,

It is a sad fact that we are losing anyone to such a deadly diease.

Does HIV factor into your considerations about being sexually involved with someone, whether for a one-night stand or a relationship? How about your decision to choose a partner in general — are you more or less likely to choose a certain “type” of partner because of the risk of HIV?

If I have a one night stand situation then yes I want to know your status and condoms will always regardless of if it is a relationship or not.

I am not sure what you mean by certain type because HIV does not pick a type of person to attach to. It is what it is and it doesnt worry about your finances, or race when it latches on.

Would you consider entering into a relationship with someone who was HIV-positive? What would you do if you found out that your partner had HIV or AIDS after you were already involved?

I have to say no I wouldnt get into a relationship with a HIV positive person…because the worry would be to much for me. However, I heard there was an HIV dating site or service that does match people who are HIV positive people together.

As for in a current relationship I would have to look at the level of involvement..is this someone that I am just having relations with? The no cant say I would stick around. Is this someone that I am deeply committed too i.e.. married, long-term relationship? Then no it is not a easy thing to just walk away from. I say every time I see Cookie Johnson she is a good woman because most women wouldnt have hung in there, the way she did with Magic. If there are vows of for better or for worse then I am about staying loyal to those vows.

Have you had experience with the “down low” phenomenon? Do you believe it to exist and be a significant risk? I have no personal experience with the down low phenomenon..at least that I am aware of as I have no built in *gaydar I believe it does exist, because lets be honest…. there is nothing new under the sunOur society is more accepting and more into name branding all types of behavior. It use to be male-female period, now we have bi-sexual, transgender, postop, preop and the list goes on and on. Hard to keep up.

By The Divine Ms. Kym

September 6, 2006 10:58 AM | Link to this

Oh and yes Laney I get tested each year regardless of sexual activity.

By 4theLongHaul

September 6, 2006 11:00 AM | Link to this

Demi Boy you crazy. Then call me Aun-T then!

By Lil demi

September 6, 2006 11:02 AM | Link to this

JustMe aka Lady Long Leggs on Demi You just lost all your cool points for agreeing with SeanJ that is not right…aleast leave me a point or two…

if the AIDS never exist, in wouldn’t suprise me if more women dated Gays men, the way some of us straight men love lesbian women…For the record Alvin hates Anal sex, that shyt aint right.

By Xavier's Dad

September 6, 2006 11:03 AM | Link to this

Hey blog fam…..I have been tested every year since I’ve been in the army.

By C tha 1

September 6, 2006 11:04 AM | Link to this

Daaaamnn JustPlain, how much venom you got in you!?

By SeanJohnson

September 6, 2006 11:05 AM | Link to this

@JustMe…Like i said…its propanda/do you really think the news will give you an accurate reflection of anything?..a flaming hot cheetos dude right a trashy book and as always women flock to buy and read it..just like yall LOVE to go to see the plays/movies of that cross dressing tranny T.P….MOST of these dudes are gay and show you signs from day ONE. Keep ya legs closed and get to know you u have intercourse with and ask questions…and take respsonsibly for your own actions…

By The Divine Ms. Kym

September 6, 2006 11:05 AM | Link to this

@JustPlain I was sitting here thinking do I know her, she sounds like one of my cousins..they all say the same things when we have some of our family gatherings and this topic comes up.

By Just plain tired

September 6, 2006 11:07 AM | Link to this

@SeanJ Not really contradicting because a world has been set up that caters to one gender. A world has been set up where the majority of the power is in the hands of one ethnicity. I recognize this and therefore have to address it. So right now I address issues according to how the world is set up as well as how we as individual need to change our thinking or continue to change our thinking(that includes me. Black men are not the only one doing bad but black men are the only one close to me doing me bad.

By Just plain tired

September 6, 2006 11:14 AM | Link to this

@C that 1 I am going to stop right now, although I have one more post before this one, but I am going to stop posting because it have gone beyond the topic.

@Dark When I typed the “projects,” I said to myself this is not just in the projects this is everywhere. Women in general have come so far but we have some back peddlers amongst us.

By SeanJohnson

September 6, 2006 11:18 AM | Link to this

@ Justplaintiredbutisoundalotlikedasv

ok…if you understand how the world is set up and how it caters to one gender or class…why would you ever believe YOU would be the cause of a problem so big? why are you blaming men like men are raping women giving them hiv? if you truly believe BF’s have the highest new hiv cases…why dont you tell them to practice abstinence or use protection at all times until both partners are test? I am a man and like said earlier…it as been RARE a woman ask me to wear a rubber…i took it upon myself to. So come give me a cyber hug and chill…i got bad nerves..

By Jewel

September 6, 2006 11:20 AM | Link to this

ABC I agree. My lifestyle keeps me out of the high-risk category. I am 40. My SO is 47. I don’t do clubs; never have, never will. Only three men on the face of this earth can honestly say they know what my body looks and feels like. My current SO is the third and hopefully the last. But isn’t it true that HIV can lie dormant for years? The one time you were not so careful can catch up with you. My point is that we can only hope and pray that AIDS never becomes a reality in our lives.

By Darkbuty

September 6, 2006 11:21 AM | Link to this

Just/SeanJ It’s easy for the men to say it’s propaganda…they’re not the immediate target for these DL brothas. They don’t have to see it as a BIG issue.

But what constitutes propaganda…if it’s 1% of the black male population that is contributing to a 10% rise in the new cases of black females getting infected..is that still propaganda? Or is it awareness? If it wasn’t for many of these books, documentaries, etc then many women wouldn’t even be on alert for DL brothas…so the media (whatever their intentions) have done a service to the black females by making the masses aware of this phenomenon.

By JustMe

September 6, 2006 11:21 AM | Link to this

Dark Yes it is real. I’ll get it this evening when I get home - Thanks!

By The Divine Ms. Kym

September 6, 2006 11:23 AM | Link to this

@SeanJ you have bad nerves??? The game is tomorrow. LMAO

By Just plain tired

September 6, 2006 11:24 AM | Link to this

@SeanJ I tried to leave it alone but you said that word propaganda again. rolling my eyes

I do not know every man so I can not speak on every man - but the ones that go to prison - what is the chance they come out the same way they went in. Then you have all these pedophiles abusing little boys and these little boys grow up confused. Then you have all the “masculine” men who defined theier “maleness” by how many women they slept with and how many children they have then turn around get high and sleep with their buddy (have to be high to do it). Yes, I personally know men on the DL - it is not just in the pages of books. My suggestion from the being- if you been with a man leave us women alone.

@Kym You would be surprise how many of us women (all colors) are just plain sick and tired and are starting to sound alike.

By 4theLongHaul

September 6, 2006 11:30 AM | Link to this

As someone stated before, it’s all about personal responsibility. As women, WE determine (unless raped) who we sleep with. Therefore, make GROWN decisions and protect yourself EVERY TIME period. End of discussion. We as women, knowing all the statistics, etc are WILLINGLY taking risks when we CHOOSE to sleep with a man without using protection. So we can’t cry victims all the time. GET TESTED and continue to get tested.

By Just plain tired

September 6, 2006 11:32 AM | Link to this

@SeanJ Okay, I heard you, I heard. You are right - but I had to get my say out first about men, but do not worry, I gots a whole lot to say about trifling women as well - them dayum back peddlers- they act like dick is going to disappear tomorrow or women who define themselves by what’s between theys legs. So I hear you, but I wants you to hear me right now.

By Candidly Speaking

September 6, 2006 11:32 AM | Link to this

You can only be responsible fo yo-self, so you have to do what’s neccessary fo u.

But don’t forget about other STD’s.

By Lil demi

September 6, 2006 11:33 AM | Link to this

Black men are not the only one doing bad but black men are the only one close to me doing me bad.

JustPlain I got it, I got it!…You need to stop dating bad black men…Heck maybe you need to stop dating period. your life, your choice, as I said before there aren’t that many bad people in the world…They just stick out more.

By JustMe

September 6, 2006 11:35 AM | Link to this

Demi JustMe aka Lady Long Leggs on Demi You just lost all your cool points for agreeing with SeanJ that is not right…aleast leave me a point or two… You get 1/2 a point for asking for something you really want :-)

SeanJ NIce try my man, but that ish won’t work with JustMe, I work in Atlanta everyday and I see countless, young boys, middle-aged men and old men, all who appear to be homosexual. It’s in the walk, the talk, the body language, there are some who can down play it from the general public, but these days, a lot of men are open about it from the color of their hair to wearing eyeliner/mascara.

I am not a woman who is into casual relations with men. I will/can/have befriend(ed) a man for life and never cross the lines of intimacy. I take full responsibility for everything that I do.

By ImAPeach404

September 6, 2006 11:35 AM | Link to this

To the group

Would I scar my 11 year old for life if I took him to visit some AIDs patients?

My mom didn’t talk to me about sex, diseases, drugs… all that important stuff. Which is probably why I have an 11yr old at 29, but anyway I want to be the exact opposite and not only talk to him about these issues but show him the effects.

By JustMe

September 6, 2006 11:47 AM | Link to this

Ima404 I think you should do it. Personally, I tell my son the truth about everything. I try very hard to teach him that he does not have to be apart of what he sees in this world, just be aware of its existence.

If you lived in a mine field, would you not show your child where every device you knew about was hidden?

By Lil demi

September 6, 2006 11:49 AM | Link to this

Mr. Candidly Speaking thanks for bring STDs up…for my brothers who WUV receiving blow-blows from women with pretty lip and straight teethes. There are some women who enjoy fruity condoms and candy tasting syrup. So always keep some on your person and only use Magnums when entering the fountain of youth…

By 4theLongHaul

September 6, 2006 11:51 AM | Link to this

ImAPeach404 Not a bad idea at all. I’d be selective maybe as to what stages of patients you might take him/her to see. A bigger question, are there places you can just take folks to randomly see AIDS patients? Aren’t there privacy issues?

By MusingLee

September 6, 2006 11:51 AM | Link to this

Morn’in All,

This is a great topic to discuss…HIV/AIDS in the Atlanta area is also very high…Although I’m not on the dating scene anymore, I was always careful with any Women I was with….Fellas, always check that bathroom cabinet, you might find some evidence that could save a “wang”!

By 4theLongHaul

September 6, 2006 11:52 AM | Link to this

demi ok, I’m stupid…what does WUV mean?

By SeanJohnson

September 6, 2006 11:53 AM | Link to this

@ Justme/Justtiredofbeingdasv….thats the point i am trying to make…those dudes are NOT DL…they are openly GAY…so if you sleep with a dude knowing he is gay…then you have to accept the risk and responsiblity..I am the only man in my dept..But i while back it was 7 other men in this Dept…and 6 of them were gay. Well 2 of them coupled off and became lovers..Well this chick who worked here began liking one of them and dude was knocking off both the dude and the chick..Now she KNEW dude was hitting that cat..it wasnt a secret around the office..Matter of fact..he turned her out…and did the other females step in and ask her what the hell is she thinking about..NOPE…was make is so foul is that the chick ended up marrying her sons father who didnt even know she was fcking a gay dude. So in this case …who is the victim?

By The Divine Ms. Kym

September 6, 2006 11:55 AM | Link to this

@Peach It depends on the kid. My son is 10 and I wouldnt take him because he has experience to much heartache and death the last few years so he is a tad sensitive to the issues of death and diease. But if your son is mature enough to handle it and can truly appreciate and learn then I say go for it. My late auntie used it a long time ago go to the hospital and hold the babies that were in ICU..I went with here a couple of time with her and it makes you really reflect that there are truly some little victims of all the drama in our world..crackbabies, abandon babies…etc. Just makes you want to reach out a slap the taste out of some of these fools. Let me stop before I start channeling my Auntie

By Just plain tired

September 6, 2006 11:57 AM | Link to this

@LilDemi Oh but you do not have it beacause it have nothing to do with dating someone it has everything to do with how you treat someone whether or not you know me or not: whether I am serving your food or preparing your food. Treat me like a person - Do you define your friends by what they can do for you (well some people do) so why do you define women that way. And why is it that men always complain about what a women does on her JOB for other people but don’t do for him - dayum man they are paying her. Okay, I said I was going to let this go.

By Lil demi

September 6, 2006 12:04 PM | Link to this

Aun-T the 4Th you are for from that S word. Wuv is now my 22mo old son says love. which is cute coming from him, but sarcastic coming from a grownup

By Just plain tired

September 6, 2006 12:06 PM | Link to this

@Sean And what we are trying to tell you is that they say they are not gay or they HIDE the fact that they have been with a man. So what are you calling these men?

OPENLY GAY people and I know some will tell you straight up they are gay. If you try to hit on them (because for some reason you can not see theys gay), they will say baby, I likes me some men.

If she KNEW what can you say to her - some women like GAY men - think they better lovers and all.

By Laney

September 6, 2006 12:10 PM | Link to this

Peach404, maybe you should consider volunteering with your son? It’s never too early to teach him good charitable values and that might expose him to people with HIV/AIDS in a very constructive, nonscary manner (rather than just showing them to him as a cautionary tale, you know)?

By Candidly Speaking

September 6, 2006 12:12 PM | Link to this

True Story

Friend of the family was kickin’ it with a dude for a few months. Dude went to taste the “love below.” So happen he had a cold sore on his lip….chick now has herpes for life.

Dude just walked away….once he found out she had contracted the disease.

By Lil demi

September 6, 2006 12:15 PM | Link to this

Just plain tired LOL point well taken…*what type of ice cream would you like

By 4theLongHaul

September 6, 2006 12:19 PM | Link to this

Demi ‘Preciate the love!!! You know y’all good for using acronyms up in here so I’m sitting here trying to figure out what on God’s green earth could WUV stand for!!!! hahaha!

It’s funny bout the openly guy dudes (especially the ones we run in to in the nail salon!) I had two shims tell me, “Girl, you bout the only woman who could turn me straight!”….ummmm, thanks for the compliment, but errr, uhhh, that ain’t an accomplishment I’m seeking to fulfill sweetie! What kills me is that a lot of these shims do ‘womanly’ stuff more extreme than a real woman!!! Sorry, just can’t understand that….. I saw a pack of them at a nail salon across from S. Dekalb Mall (I was on the way somewhere in Decatur and had an emergency nail situation!!!) Getting the full acrylic nail treatment with red polish, etc, getting eyebrows waxed etc. And what was crazier is that they were with this big UGLY chick who had the nerve to have on one of them camosole/lingerie style shirts! UGH!!!!! If she wasn’t a real woman, she could’ve SURELY passed for an ugly transvestite!!!

By Lil demi

September 6, 2006 12:22 PM | Link to this

Candidly Speaking Awww heck no, say it ain’t so!…When I had my little sore this pass winter, I kept to myself…Oh that’s one of those dude Just Plain was talking about…a crying shame.

By JustMe

September 6, 2006 12:24 PM | Link to this

SeanJ That girl was on dope or dog food - I can’t even call what she was doing. If she walked in with her eyes wide shut, then no one needed to tell her anything, she already knew. I sure hate it for her and whoever she married. Dude that was hittin her….. should be considered bisexual, cuz he’s still getting cooty.

It’s the brothers who hide it and won’t admit to it on their dead relatives graves that are on the DL and causing problems.

By Page1908

September 6, 2006 12:24 PM | Link to this

LOL @ Laney getting her research from Ebony magazine.

By Raqi

September 6, 2006 12:28 PM | Link to this

Peach404 on another site it is actually being discussed at what age and to what extent of reality should we allow our kids to be exposed to. I am one for informing the youth about what is really going on in the world.

By JustMe

September 6, 2006 12:29 PM | Link to this

4TLH That story is too funny.

Back in the day when I lived in the “D”. The Pros hung out on Woodward Ave, and me and my girl would go down there and talk trash to them Do yo Mama know what you doing out here this late? anyway, one night unbeknownst to us, the what-we-thought-were-ladies were tranny’s and they threw bottles and rocks at my car, I have never laughed so hard in my life. I had no idea they were real until that night in the late 80’s.

By 4theLongHaul

September 6, 2006 12:29 PM | Link to this

Candidly If ole boy had a VISIBLE cold sore on his lip (I mean dang, they’re hard to hide), why in the helllly wouls friend of family let him go down! See…that’s just stupid. Dang!

By Blue_Kolla

September 6, 2006 12:35 PM | Link to this

Plain Tired raising your sons to be taken care of and your daughters to be survivors.

That would entail being real parents, and not necessarily friends with our children. And most are too weak mentally and emotionally to stand having their children mad at them.

but maybe that is what you want then you can forget where you came from and blend in with the majority eventually.

Now you trying to kick a brotha in the Johnson…

LOL @ SeanJ Justplaintiredbutisoundalotlikedasv

By 4theLongHaul

September 6, 2006 12:37 PM | Link to this

Hey y’all, this is TOTALLY off the subject, but have you ever found yourself not being able to sleep EARLY in the darn morning (like 1am) and find yourself watching a STUPID movie like “House of Wax”! Man, that had to be the dumbest movie I’ve ever seen (but I couldn’t seem to just turn it off after yelling out WHITE PEOPLE JUST STUPID!!!) No, I’m not a racist but come on!!! Can anybody be man or woman enough to admit that you saw this movie? (Paris Hilton and other bad actors/actresses) hahahaha!!! Sorry, just had to get that off my chest.

and one more point of true confession Please don’t pull my Black People of America card when I say this but……..yesterday was the FIRST time I ever saw The Color Purple in its entirety. (now I shall prepare to be stoned…..)HA!

OK, sorry for the digression…

By Just plain tired

September 6, 2006 12:41 PM | Link to this

@everyone,

I have a question. Does anyone know of any DL women? Or is it more acceptable for a woman to sleep with another woman and not be considered gay than for a man to sleep with another man?

Do men even care if a woman has slept with another woman before?

By Blue_Kolla

September 6, 2006 12:41 PM | Link to this

JustMe Dude that was hittin her….. should be considered bisexual, cuz he’s still getting cooty.

Sorry slim, ain’t no such thing, you’re either straight… or a f@g - no in-betweens, grey areas, lukewarms, and all that shyt.

By Blue_Kolla

September 6, 2006 12:50 PM | Link to this

Keepin’ it Real: Women here are mad at DL brothas for issuing death sentences. So why do you think it OK for dudes to put on dresses and speak with b!tch accents? Because they’re getting paid? Does that change anything? Yoll know where I’m at - Tyler Perry. I don’t hear anyone speaking on him. Why?

Newsflash: That dude is a f@g.

By SeanJohnson

September 6, 2006 12:51 PM | Link to this

@ BK….u are right…either you are into that dookie luv or not…no middle ground…

By Prince Charming

September 6, 2006 12:56 PM | Link to this

@ Raqi, you are right, why would a one night stand owe you anything? That is why it is up to everyone to protect themselves.

@ 4the long, I understand what you mean about your pastor being upfront with you, but it’s not his duty to watch over you, just to teach you the word and help you with your issues. God watches over us. You are right, I stand corrected, he did not judge, but the warning really could have been in a more non-condescending way. Maybe it reads worse than it sounds.

@ Just plain, let me explain what I mean. As a male, I will never understand what it is to be female and vice versa. The journey a male has to take to become man fights a lot of battles and stereotypes that may not always include a loving role model. Most of us always have a mother in the house be it mother or grandmother. So for females, there is that constant daily presence of love, assurance, understanding and teaching of what it takes for you as a female to do the best you can for your family inspite of any circumstances you may encounter. Men do not always have that. Even with fathers in the home, including birth fathers, the emotion may not be there. We expect out little boys “to be a man” without teaching him what that is. Now in this new world with men having to compete with women in jobs, education, etc., where as before we never had to do it before, we have to adjust without any blue print to teach us how to do it. But , we are expected to know. That is some of what a male goes thru.

Sounds like you have been thru a lot. Sorry to hear it. Not sure how old you are but there is a point in life where you have to look within and make different and better choices.

@ SeanJ, I got your back boyyeeee! I knew the women would come after you! LOL! Sometimes women are not honest with themselves, make wrong choices, etc. we could go on and on, but that is a different blog. I agree with you on women asking me to wear protection, I have to bring it up and make sure it’s on correct. Not a problem cuz I know it is best for me. Just seems like more women would insist on it. Man, your job sounds like a TV reality show for real!

@ JustMe, We are not talking about the D/L boys, that whole thing is just trifling. No other way to put it. Thanks for the props. I think any man that does not feel that there is nothing stronger than a strong, beautiful black woman by his side is really missing out. Not to diss women of other races, but you have to give credit where it is do. Sisters will put up with a lot and love a brother unconditionally and that is something you have to respect.

By Lil demi

September 6, 2006 12:56 PM | Link to this

Do men even care if a woman has slept with another woman before?

No I do not! As long as baby girl paper work is full of negs

By Just plain tired

September 6, 2006 12:57 PM | Link to this

@4TLH

WHAT! WHAT! That is my movie, The Color Purple. Whew! Watched it so many times. Just love it when Shug Avery goes to church. “see daddy, sinners have souls too.” Great movie. Just great. Everyone involved should be given an honorary OSCAR.

Now back to House of Wax, for shame, for shame. I started watching it, not really knowing what it was and then I saw Paris H and I was like oh hellz naw and turned the TV.

@Blue In some instances you have a lot of young people having babies and they do not properly rear them, but then again you just have a lot of “brainwashed” people in the world that will have one curfew for their son and another curfew for their daughter. Then they try to be all strict on the girl because she brings the baby home but the boy can do what he wants because the baby is going to be at someone else’s house. You know what that has taught you boys - how NOT to be responsible for ones actions - instead you have all these guys thinking they do not have to play a MAJOR role in their children lives.

I am not DASV!

By SeanJohnson

September 6, 2006 01:01 PM | Link to this

@BK..i gave that tranny a shout out in my 11:06 post…he turned being a tranny into a 100-200 million dollar empire..and whats so funny.. 99 percent of the females on here will marry him and sleep with him RAW..

By Just plain tired

September 6, 2006 01:02 PM | Link to this

@Blue, Tyler Perry, never seen any of his movies but I did watch Martin Lawerence and Jamie Fox and they dressed up like women as well. I laughed at Mama Payne, Big Momma and Wanda because they were characters. Now if dude is doing that for real real then that is another story.

By Lil demi

September 6, 2006 01:07 PM | Link to this

You know what that has taught you boys - how NOT to be responsible for ones actions - instead you have all these guys thinking they do not have to play a MAJOR role in their children lives.

Is it the mother’s fault or is it the daddy’s fault. These questions and more, on AJC blog’s show…

By Blue_Kolla

September 6, 2006 01:09 PM | Link to this

Plain Tired I am not DASV!

You might not be DAS but you are dayum sure somebody reg-la, to know how she spells her name. LOL So take off that cyber-hood.

By Raqi

September 6, 2006 01:09 PM | Link to this

So why do you think it OK for dudes to put on dresses and speak with b!tch accents? Because they’re getting paid? Does that change anything? Yoll know where I’m at - Tyler Perry. I don’t hear anyone speaking on him. Why?

@BlueK because Flip Wilson played Geraldine, Jamie Foxx played Wanda, Tom Hanks played Buffy and Martin Lawrence played Sheneneh and no one ever questioned their masculinity. IMO they all found something that gets them paid and they ran with it.

By JustMe

September 6, 2006 01:11 PM | Link to this

Blue/SeanJ I can understand the o middle ground on that issue.

As for TP and other men who may or may not be gay, I could care less, I am not planning on sleeping with them. If that what they want to do, do the dayum thang and do it well. It’s the brothers who want to straddle the fence on both sides that I have an issue with. PICK A TEAM AND STICK WITH IT!

Totally unrelated I was reading the blog on Atlanta getting a new stadium…….. how come somebody up in ther with MY NAME!! I am JustMe not that person, and they had the nerves to spell it the same way…….. friggin lurkers!

Prince I like the description of the journey you gave. I’ll remember that. Well Said!

By Page1908

September 6, 2006 01:12 PM | Link to this

That’s funny Prince because I know of hella dudes let’s say in the past 2 years who if I hadn’t told them to strap up, they would not have done so! So, I think it does work both ways.

LOL @ the new and improved DAS!

LOL @ dookie luv YUCK!!!!!!!!

I think the bottom line in the whole matter is that there are some dudes who are still runnin up in the Taco raw and there are some females who still let the dudes run up in the Taco raw.

One dude I used to work with would tell me and another co-worker how he never wears a rain coat. He made no bones about it. He said he likes to go back door then run up in the taco immediately afterwards. He doesn’t even wash the dookey off!

By JustMe

September 6, 2006 01:14 PM | Link to this

Raqi You forgot Dustin Hoffman in Tootsie, and what about the Wyanas Brohters on In Living Color, they played a fruity roles too.

By Blue_Kolla

September 6, 2006 01:14 PM | Link to this

SeanJ Mayne, I missed your 11:05 but it don’t suprise me ‘cause me and you seem to have the same eye on a lot of different BS. And you’re right, these honies would be throwing down the draws and crying the blues next week. Mayne, it was the same thing with Luther. And the real is… that as long as a brother is holding down a position of power/prestige, regardless of what else he’s into, these same 2-faced-ted chicks are gonna play the dyck jockey, ride all day, and cry when they get thrown off. And yeah… Jamie is suspect too.

By Just plain tired

September 6, 2006 01:15 PM | Link to this

@Prince Actually I haven’t been through it. I have been with my man for a little over a year and we have our ups and downs like everyone else but that is to be expected.

My anger is at this constant disrepect toward women especially black women as if we are nothing but a rug to be walked on. I agree with SeanJ that black women need to be more conscious of who they sleep with and to DEMAND protection. But one thing you said was that Sisters will put up with a lot and love a brother unconditionally and that is something you have to respect.

ARE men taking adavantage of this- our helpful spirit, our it is going to get beter attitude, our the LORD did not put more on you than you can bear resolve?

By Lil demi

September 6, 2006 01:16 PM | Link to this

Jamie