AJC.com > Living > Blog > Archives > 2007 > July > 27 > Entry
Rules of the game
The Atlanta Journal-Constitution
There are some very admirable people on the Atlanta dating scene (some of you are with them!), people with whom we didn’t “click” with but enjoyed a pleasant conversation over dinner, people who have it together but just aren’t made for us.
There are, however, people out there we wish we’d never met, people who wasted our time, and people who don’t know what they’re doing.
If dating is a game (disclaimer: I’m not saying it has to be, but many times it feels that way), what should the rules be? In other words, if you ran the universe, what would be the official dating guidelines?
For example, mine might include:
- NO telling me you love me unless a ring is on the way.
- NO hitting on me after I just saw you hit on my friend five minutes ago.
- If you’re with someone for a year or more and you aren’t serious about him or her, end it.
What would your dating rules be?
Permalink | Comments (275) | Post your comment | Categories: Dating
Comments
By Sexione
July 27, 2007 8:20 AM | Link to this
Happy Friday Everybody!!!!
Sexi looking around blogville……hello, hello, hello…anybody here? Oh well, may as well fix some drinks…..hehehehe
By GA.Man AKA "Mr. Entertainment"
July 27, 2007 8:25 AM | Link to this
Good Morning Coffee and doughnuts,fresh fruit and juice
Be back later Lil GaMan and I are off to the movies….gonna see a rat that cooks…..lol
By SlimOne
July 27, 2007 8:28 AM | Link to this
TGIF!!!!
For Real I saw Little Miss Sunshine last night. That was a very interesting movie to say the least.
By SlimOne
July 27, 2007 8:31 AM | Link to this
Don’t tell me you’re looking to settle down and all that hoopla just to get my guard down and see my camel toe.
Don’t try to talk to me if you’re married.
By kinderbabe
July 27, 2007 8:36 AM | Link to this
good morning, slimone and GAman:) i have to think on this dating rules thing. i’ll get around to it a couple of posts later…lol.
GAman sounds like you’re going to see ratatouille (sp?)…make sure you give us a review on that.:)
By TRAVIS SMITH "aka" The Type Of BLOGGER You Want To Take To Ya Momma House"
July 27, 2007 8:37 AM | Link to this
Good Morning Bella over the last 2 or three relationships i have had cell phone issues. Some women are really caught up over whose calling you on your cell and whose texting you. If you do not pay my cell phone bill, DO NOT ANSWER IT OR TRY TO CHECK MY TEXTS!!! (even if you did pay it you still cant check it!!!) I dont know if the rest of the bloggers have had their BF or GF try to check their messages or calls but i have. **RULE #1 If I dont go in your phone dont go in mine! Privacy is a must!!!
By Sexione
July 27, 2007 8:43 AM | Link to this
Rules….hmmmm
Yep Slim, Don’t try to talk to me if you’re married!
Don’t try to mislead me into thinking you want more than just the one thing I know you want!
Don’t lie to me!
Don’t ask me to do anything for you that you wouldn’t do for me!
By SlimOne
July 27, 2007 8:44 AM | Link to this
If I just met you, don’t end every sentence with Honey, Baby, Sugar, Babe etc…You haven’t earned the right to refer to me in that way. We are not together
Don’t try to holla at my mom.
By QC - TGIF!
July 27, 2007 8:45 AM | Link to this
Good Merting Bloggers
Hey Sexione, GA.man, SlimOne, WLB/MLB, erry’boddy
Bella your topics have really been off da chain this weeks, congrats!
The #1 dating rule i have is just please, please have a job don’t lie about where you work, or something you don’t have…it’s soooo not hard to please QC i’m the nicest, sweetest, caring, loving person you’ll ever meet in your life It’s the little things that impress me the most Just be yourself! You can tell me you love me without a ring, just be sincere about it Sometimes you can’t help it if you’re attracted to your friends ex after 5 years it should be all good, but i would still talk to my girl about it, not to ask “her permission” but to let her know, yes we’re attracted to each other; & in the process of “possibly persuing a relationship”…That’s my $1.15 worth of comments, after dating someone for a year if it’s not going anywhere i would end it…well have a great day all, i’ll check back later!
QC is thirsty….hopefully Sexieone made some “Mimosa’s”
By M.
July 27, 2007 8:52 AM | Link to this
Morning Blog
My rules would be that until we have “The TALK”, that we are just dating and not together. Don’t get the situation confused and automatically sign yourself up as the #1 contender.
Also if you aren’t interested in someone, don’t waste their time, money, energy, resources, text messages, dinners, movies, emails, etc…
@ Travis
You are telling the truth! This happened to me last weekend. Went out to the Velvet Room, she got drunk started going crazy, took my phone and locked herself in the room and starting going through numbers, text, and pictures. She got her feelings hurt…..
By SlimOne
July 27, 2007 8:57 AM | Link to this
Hey Gaman,Kinder,Sexione,Travis,demi,SJ3K,4Real,Musing,Mo,Mocha,Mochalatte,QC,…EVERYbody
Travis How old are you?
BELLA So you don’t believe a person should make it known that they love you unless they are prepared to propose? I find that a little baffling. Please elaborate if you would
By Sexione
July 27, 2007 8:59 AM | Link to this
Travis I haven’t had that one! And the only persons phone I will go thru is my childs…….and that’s my job!! lol
Heeeyyyy QC You know I have the Mimosas for everybody!! Ladies first……. lol
By TRAVIS SMITH "aka" The Type Of BLOGGER You Want To Take To Ya Momma House"
July 27, 2007 9:02 AM | Link to this
I feel you sexione dont lie!!! Dont tell me your independent and then turn around and ask 4 help on one of your bills!!! If you so independent you need to go out and get that money up independently!!!!
By SlimOne
July 27, 2007 9:04 AM | Link to this
M Was this person you just met at the Velvet Room or someone you’ve been dating for a while? What was the outcome of that situation?
By TRAVIS SMITH "aka" The Type Of BLOGGER You Want To Take To Ya Momma House"
July 27, 2007 9:07 AM | Link to this
@ M * that cell phone will break a relationship up or start one from happening!!! *@ Slimone Im 25 @sexione I lay my phone down and have it on a certain contact, then i leave the room or go to the restroom just to see if she touches it!!!
By M.
July 27, 2007 9:11 AM | Link to this
@ SlimOne
No, it’s someone that I have been talking to for a while. We all were there to celebrate a coworkers birthday so I invited her and the rest was history. I guess the outcome was just her continually being mad, but I would not go through your phone, so I just didnt understand her need to go through mind. I guess she’s not that mad, she keeps calling…
By Mimi
July 27, 2007 9:13 AM | Link to this
for me it’s quiet simple. I mean… I have freinds, a job, a family, hobbies… you know. So please if I decide to cut a little bit of my time with my girls…. it might be because… I’m interested. so
Don’t tell me that I don’t care about YOU (seriously get over yourself!!!!) cause I could be doing someting else but…no I still take the time to find some place for you in my busy schedule… and BY THE WAY… I’ll never ever ask you that.
I HAVE MY LIFE, you have YOURS and we have one together…. And for your information,, this is three separate things
Don’t ever lie to me…. I’ll be gone before you know it…
Respect and trust, I never had to justified myself to my father so… don’t even think about it
These are the big lines… there’s some others but … anyways, I’m open minded so…..we can still have conversation about…..
But I’m a nice person I just don’t like waisting my time.. and I hate when people play with my feeling, I don’t play any games, I don’t know the rules anyway (and I don’t want to know)so….
that’s it….
everyone have a great day
:)
By SlimOne
July 27, 2007 9:16 AM | Link to this
Travis I can lock the applications on my phone. So if i leave the room they can open my phone and think they’re about to get the juicy…but “ENTER PASSWORD” will come up on the screen. Can’t see text msgs, call history, pictures, or videos. (Just have to remember to lock it up)
By Sexione
July 27, 2007 9:17 AM | Link to this
Travis huh? Now how did we go from cell phone to help with a bill? And just for the record, independent folks at some point in life can need help too. Just because one is independent doesn’t mean they are inhuman! Maybe that is the “25” in you speaking…………hmmmm
By Biff
July 27, 2007 9:19 AM | Link to this
Don’t go out with me if you aren’t going to give it up.
By Mo (now known as Moeisha
July 27, 2007 9:21 AM | Link to this
Hey guys!! Just checking in on you all from Richmond, VA. Man those folks had the courthouse (and around it) on lock for Vick yesterday
Its good to see the MLB stepping up on the breakfast thing!
on topic I agree with whomever said it earlier: DO NOT tell me you love after 5mins of knowing me, no calling me anything but ‘Mo’, DO NOT try to monopolize every moment of my time like we have been dating forever, DO NOT smother me and DO NOT ASK ME FOR MONEY!!!!
QCF Thanks for holding it down
For Real can you give me a song, PLEEEZE!!
MochaTreat I didnt get mail cause I am not at home, give me your email addy and I’ll hit you from here in VA
By QC - TGIF!
July 27, 2007 9:24 AM | Link to this
I never understood the purpose of going thru your mates cell phone are you that insecure cause that’s all it is…so what if he/she talks to other people during your relationship? As long as you know you’re the one then don’t trip! Geesh, i honestly can not stand that, just like M said you’ll get your feelings hurt cause you might just see a name/number in there and be shocked! That’s grounds to not even answer my phone when you call…just get over it, act like an adult….
QC needs a re-fill Sexione
By SlimOne
July 27, 2007 9:28 AM | Link to this
Biff Do you make it known upfront that a chick must give it up to go out with you?
M She is probably mad but thinks since she knows whatever it is she found out, that you won’t keep doing it since its out in the open…hence her still calling. Did she find out you were sxing up some other girl or what?
I’m guilty of doing that in the past and got my feelings hurt all the time. Lesson learned. I don’t go looking for trouble anymore and It’ll come out eventually if i need to know. Got tired of living so guarded every time that person got a text or phone call he wouldn’t answer.
By QC - TGIF!
July 27, 2007 9:30 AM | Link to this
SlimOne that’s exactly how my phone is….Biff what are you talking about….give up what dear????
By Sexione
July 27, 2007 9:32 AM | Link to this
Another round of Mimosas……QC where’s your big azz cup, I’m gonna fill it to the rim! lol And you’re exactly right about the insecurity……..going thru someones phone, that’s very juvenile!
Hey Mo, how’s the weather in Richmond?
What’s going on with the NBAF this weekend?
By TRAVIS SMITH "aka" The Type Of BLOGGER You Want To Take To Ya Momma House"
July 27, 2007 9:37 AM | Link to this
@ SLIMONE I shouldnt have to lock my phone just to keep someone from being nosy!!! Its real simple IF ITS NOT YOURS DONT TOUCH!!! @ sexione its not the age speaking its the truth dont talk about what all you have,(material) and have accomplished in life and how your so independent, when you really need help. Not everyone can drive a BENZ someone has to drive the FORD FOCUS. Its all about staying in your lane if your independent!!!! You wouldnt need any help if you stop tryna live like the jones and stay in your lane. The BENZ PAYMENT IS 600 a month but you need a 100 because your short. The Ford Focus payment is 275 a month you just saved 325 buy staying in your lane!!!
By kinderbabe
July 27, 2007 9:39 AM | Link to this
i’m not sure how we got on the phone thing but that certainly would be a rule of mine…don’t go through my phone. respect my privacy. that’s a given though. i have never gone through anyone’s phone. that’s just too much.
By SeanJohnson3000
July 27, 2007 9:45 AM | Link to this
Sup Blog…sup Slim..sup QC…sup Moeiesha in VA..TGIF
By Mo (now known as Moeisha
July 27, 2007 9:45 AM | Link to this
Sexione Its hot as usual here!! WHEW!! I WANT A MIMOSA TOO! Someone have one for me!!
Hey *Kinderbabe! I agree with you guys about the cell phone too. Even though some people dont like to agree, RESPECT my privacy….RESPECT!!!
By Lola
July 27, 2007 9:47 AM | Link to this
When I was dating, there were three questions I always asked the guy on a first date. Before asking them, I let my date know that I was about to ask them three very important and potentially controversial things, but that a wrong answer to any of them was a deal breaker.
1) Have you always been a man? 2) Have you ever been with another man? 3) Do you believe in God?
The correct answers to those are “No”, “No”, and “Yes”. Anything beside those three answers was a definite deal-breaker. I would now also add a fourth:
4) Do you have any felony convictions?
I figure the other stuff can be worked out, as long as those four are answered in the right way.
By melo
July 27, 2007 9:48 AM | Link to this
Good morning all. Mines would be: 1) the fact that we had sex don’t mean we now husband and wife 2) Dont play hard to get but start blowing up my 4ne, all of a sudden once we do the tango 3)Please respect my privacy, if u want to visit my place, let me know..dont sneak on me. 4) Why do we all of a sudden have to talk about where we are? we just had sex, thats all..lets enjoy the ride and see where it takes us!
By Sexione
July 27, 2007 9:50 AM | Link to this
Travis sounds like you’ve been burned. sry! Look at it this way (or at least try to), every woman that may need help from time to time is not spending beyond her means, or trying to keep up (as you say). And all women don’t go around spouting off about what she has or has accomplished. That’s what the insecure, immature ones do.
Question…..(for the men mostly)
If your SO (not just some random chick) was struggling financially (not necessarily all the time, just maybe with a bill here or there), would you offer to help? Or would you just sit by and watch her struggle? What if she never asked for your help, would you offer?
Ladies….
If your SO knew you were having a hard time and never offered to help, would that alter your thinking/views of him? Would that alter your thinking/views of him as a potential “head of household” (if that potential was present)?
By Cemeeli
July 27, 2007 9:50 AM | Link to this
Hey my fellow WLB and ;-) to my MLB
If married, if seperated or divorce let me know. I NEED TO KNOW or i will definitley SNAP on you! Idiot.
The cell phone i s mine. Yours is yours. Call and text whom you like….cause i am.
By QC - TGIF!
July 27, 2007 9:53 AM | Link to this
Hey Mo
Sexione Here’s my cup..thanks girl!
Hey kinderB
By SlimOne
July 27, 2007 9:54 AM | Link to this
Travis You’re right that you shouldn’t have to lock it but it’s just a precautionary measure with me. Person looks in your phone, sees something that pizzez them off, now they want you to explain what they saw in there….Not interested in there. I’m glad I grew out of that.
Ever since the condom in the trash incident, I’m even scared to throw anything away at any dudes house.
Slim: Hey babe can you throw this away for me?
Dude: Why can’t you do it, you’re standing right next to it
Slim: I can’t do it….I’m….scared
Dude: You’re scared of the trashcan?
Slim starts to shake like Pookie and cries like a baby throwing a temper tandrum
DuDe: Alright alright. I’ll throw it away. Give it here
Slim spits wad of gum into Dudes hand and he passes the f/k out because he’s a germophobe
By Tazzee
July 27, 2007 9:58 AM | Link to this
Morning Folks!
I have to co-sign M with the following:
My rules would be that until we have “The TALK”, that we are just dating and not together. Don’t get the situation confused and automatically sign yourself up as the #1 contender.
Like SlimOne - don’t use terms of endearment with me until we’ve reached the point of being endearing to one another. Oh and Slim - Little Miss Sunshine was hilarious to me - one of those movies where you really don’t know what’s coming next. Every time I hear SuperFreak I laugh.
By QC - TGIF!
July 27, 2007 9:58 AM | Link to this
Hey SJ how are you?
Sexione Yes that would alter my views, especially a possible head of household and he knows i’m struggling and won’t offer any help, that’s just being selfish to me…cause i would offer to help my Man if i knew he needed it..i’m the type who would go make a honest deposit in your bank account or just leave a little something for you under your pillow, in your car, or by your wallet, etc…cause i’m sweet, caring & generous like that why now help out and be a blessing to someone & God will bless YOU!
By Cemeeli
July 27, 2007 9:59 AM | Link to this
Sexione Travis has some good point and some not so good IMO. As you know we independent women can handle anything that is thrown our way with God’s help. Actually it’s God that fixes it. But if we are seeing someone exclusively and if i am having a little issue in the finances/car/handy work @ da house. And if dude KNOWS that i am needing help and he does absolutely nothing about it…SEE YA!!!!
By melo
July 27, 2007 9:59 AM | Link to this
@Slim, i think Biff rule is legitimate for grown folks, unless we met in the Church and have celbate rules established upfront. Why waste my time,money and energy entertaining u when u want to be miserly with the puddy.At some near future u got to know u have to give it up. Otehrwise just tell me to get lost and i will move on.
By Sexione
July 27, 2007 10:00 AM | Link to this
Lola That’s a good start, but I’m not sure that just because those answers are no, no, yes, no, that all other stuff can be worked out. He could believe in God, and still be crazy. He could not have any felony convictions (yet), and still be a stalker/abuser/pedofile……almost anything. He could have never been with a man (again, yet), but be fantasizing about it. See what I mean? Maybe you should update your list. Good start though, lol
By Mo (now known as Moeisha
July 27, 2007 10:00 AM | Link to this
off topic my sister thinks we are hilarious guys and wanted to tell everyone hello! Mo’s sister waving at everyone in Blogsville
By Ladylike
July 27, 2007 10:00 AM | Link to this
TGIFriday, All.
Stop tripping about being in the friend zone who ever you are dating needs to be friends as well as lovers.
Yes, do respect an independent woman because she’s also secure; everybody knows any real independent woman would tell you to take your phone to the bathroom with your, you know you like text while sitting on the toilet. haha, LOL
Stop dating people you don’t see a future with. Convenient dating like convenient booty is boring and selfish.
By Cemeeli
July 27, 2007 10:01 AM | Link to this
Slim YOU ARE CRASI!!!!
That is your past girl. You look better in the future. Right???
By Bre
July 27, 2007 10:04 AM | Link to this
meloI think more woman would get a man where she really wants him, if she would just enjoy the ride. Gosh thats key to alot but so many don’t get that.
Lola You might want to add in there Medical History.
sexionebeen there done many tshirts esp since I’ve always been a ride or die chick. I have no problem helping out, if he handling everything else I don’t look at him as if he can’t be head of household. 10 to 1 I seem to always have more disposable income than men I date. So if I bring it up I pay for it.
on topic 1: Don’t ask to meet any family if we just started dating. 2: No I don’t cook for anyone unless I want to, don’t ask. 3: Please don’t say, “can I just see what it feel likes real quick” That will get you packed up and out the door in about 2.2 seconds. 4: Don’t ask any question that you are not sure you can handle the answer to or the question coming back at you.
By melo
July 27, 2007 10:06 AM | Link to this
@Sexi, if its my SO,sure i would willingly and gladly help without having her ask me, if i can. Thats what luv is all about.
By kinderbabe
July 27, 2007 10:07 AM | Link to this
mo hey girl! so you’re in VA, huh? how long will you be there? we’re seeing eye to eye on the privacy thing. i’m not looking through anyone’s stuff. that just haves “insecurity” written all over it. if i’m feeling that shaky, i need to roll out…lol.
QC hey!
sexione if i were having a hard time and my SO didn’t offer to help me out, i wouldn’t feel any kind of way about it. now, if it was super serious (more than a year), i may have a slight eye roll for him…lol. but if we’re just dating, i wouldn’t expect him to take care of his bills and mine. the only exception i could see is if he was very wealthy and obviously had it like that. most of the guys i date though are not in that position, lol. i would be more concerned w/my SO acting funny and distancing himself b/c of my situation. you know? some men can be like that…getting incognegro when times get hard, lol. it doesn’t always have to be a financial hardship. now that would be a dealbreaker.
By QC - TGIF!
July 27, 2007 10:09 AM | Link to this
Hey Mo’s Sister! girl feel free to jupm right in…grab a Mimosa!
By Summer
July 27, 2007 10:09 AM | Link to this
Don’t step to me talking about what you got, your car, your 26’s, how much you spend at the strip club and the bars, and the mall and out with yo boys, and then not offer to help me out if I need it. And I won’t ask, so if it’s not offered……………buh bye!
By melo
July 27, 2007 10:11 AM | Link to this
@Bre, thanks for being so mature about about this. You must be one of the few grown and sexy ladies up in here!!
By Tiff
July 27, 2007 10:17 AM | Link to this
Morning All
Question (not quite on topic but its related..LOL)
What exactly does “enjoy the ride mean”?
How many “rides” is a woman supposed to take before she’s just considered a hobby horse so to speak?
How many other people is it ok for the person you’re seeing to be sexin’ while you are “enjoying the ride”?
What constitutes enough reason to get off the ride if you’re only supposed to be enjoying it in the first place?
I’m curious because I hear that so often but I don’t quite get it. Sorry, I’m kinda slow sometimes LOL
By QC - TGIF!
July 27, 2007 10:22 AM | Link to this
Hey TIFF where you been hiding, it’s so good to read ya!!!!
By SlimOne
July 27, 2007 10:23 AM | Link to this
Tazzee That movies was filled with surprises. I couldn’t belief half the stuff that was in it especially the SuperFreak talent tidbit. LOL! And about that pet names thing when we just met…It really irritates me if you’re talking to the guy and he has his friends around and every other word is baby this, baby that. It makes me feel like he’s trying to front for the homies like he has it like that. Naw bruh, it ain’t like dat!
Sexione It would raise a red flag if a guy didn’t offer to help. As much as dudes on this blog say how they like to feel needed and be providers and all that jazz, then to turn around and ignore the batsignal for help is preposterous. I would offer if I could.
melo I can understand you wanting to be intimate for all your money spent or time spent. BUT just because a dude takes me out to eat doesn’t mean I owe him some cutty. I’m not a DinnerHo and I’m not going to have chemistry with every guy that wants to take me out. If we go out and I’m feeling the guy, and my camel toe whispers to me under the table saying she wants to meet his Johnson….then and only then will we engage in the horizontal, vertical, diagonal tango…Feel me?
Sexione Good points on your 10:00 post.
Cemeeli That stuff is Most definitely the past. Unlike some folks on this blog, I can admit mine. I’m more comfortable and secure with myself. Only life and experience could’ve taught me that. I don’t have the power to be everywhere all the time or keep someone from doing what they want to do. Impossible Plus there maybe days when my phone blows up at 3 in the morning. lol J/K
Bre Don’t ask any question that you are not sure you can handle the answer to or the question coming back at you. I cosign that post in huge block letters
By T-Mango
July 27, 2007 10:24 AM | Link to this
Morning…these are three of my DB’s.
1.) Do not ask me the questions “Who’s your daddy?” or “What’s my name?” I hate that…
2.)Please do not call and text me every two hours asking me “What are you doing?”. Chances are I am working and you should be doing the same my brotha.
3.) If you have a child and we just started dating please don’t ask me if I want to hang out with y’all at the Chuck E. Cheese. It’s too early to meet and spend time with your child at that point.
By Tazzee
July 27, 2007 10:25 AM | Link to this
melo it’s not about being grown and sexy - it’s about knowing what you can handle. There are some women that can separate the physical from the emotional. I don’t know any, but from reading this blog, there are some. But what amazes me is you men KNOW that women get possessive and clingy after sex. YOU KNOW THIS!!! But yet you still expect a different result. My personal opinion is that, in general, women aren’t wired to just have sex and leave it at that. Similarly, men aren’t wired to go without it. So you have men that, because they want it, expect women to change their wiring. Then you have women that want men to do without until the emotional connection is there. It is a disconnect, one of the many that need to be worked through in relationships.
The ability to have sex without wanting to be exclusive does not make a woman grown and sexy - it makes a woman able to have sex without needing that attachment.
By GA.Man AKA "Mr. Entertainment"
July 27, 2007 10:25 AM | Link to this
Ok..news flash…all kind of folks go to the movies on friday morning…i was like dang gome it…lol
But i bought tickets for the first show tom.soooo ya’ll gonna have to wait until monday for the rat that cooks preview….lol
HHHmmm i guess i would help out my SO…that only makes sense..but we got to be down like 4 flat tires on a yugo with 6 fat folks in it.(Disclaimer: if you are big boned or just hugh…i am sorry…no pun intended..See GaMan aint little either so..don’t be madd)lolololol
By Alvin
July 27, 2007 10:28 AM | Link to this
Sexione Hell no!!! (and good morning to you)
melo & Biff I agree with ever you guys just posted!!!
QC, Slim, KB, Cemeeli, and the Tazz Morning!!
Lola No, No, and Yes…holla at your boy when I am single again LOL
By Mochalatte Peach with Extra Cream
July 27, 2007 10:28 AM | Link to this
Good Morning QC, Slim GA.Man, Kinder, Bella, Sexi and the rest of the crew and Newbies
Mochalatte takes deep breath and exhales after making sure she covered the formalities
What’s good peeps? It’s FRIDAY!!!
My rules:
Don’t tell someone you love them if you don’t mean it.
Say what you mean and mean what you say.
Don’t Front, Flex or any of the other stupid ish. If you ain’t got, so what, be happy with what you got.
If you are hitting on my friend, don’t hit on me later. And I do mean at any point because why do I want leftovers?
More to come…
By melo
July 27, 2007 10:30 AM | Link to this
Slim, we arent talking about just one date, but a couple of dates.
By Single & Luvin It
July 27, 2007 10:30 AM | Link to this
How about this? Don’t ask me to buy a gun for you because you have “record” and I don’t. Are you freakin kidding me?! Sorry, but my resume does not say that I’m an illegal arms dealer. That’s my deal breaker.
By SlimOne
July 27, 2007 10:31 AM | Link to this
T-Mango Ugggghhh I hate when dudes ask what’s his name or who’s your daddy! Knowing how I am, I’ll say LL Cool J or something like that. Mood Killer lmao
By Tiff
July 27, 2007 10:32 AM | Link to this
Hey QC
I’m here almost every day lurking. I don’t participate much since I would just be repeating what some of the others are saying. Good to read you’re doing well. Keep posting those jobs for us. I’m about to blow my top in my current position so I may need a lead or two. LOL
By CoCo
July 27, 2007 10:33 AM | Link to this
Goodmorning Blog fam…on topic 1. Lets be friends and if I like you we can build on that. 2.Respect me 3.Be honest. No one has time for games. If you just wanna kick it say that. Don’t act like you really want to be the one when you really just want to kick it. My time is very limited.
@ Biff WTF??
By kinderbabe
July 27, 2007 10:34 AM | Link to this
t-mango now those are some funny ones..lmao”
slim we have to put DinnerHo right under the “all cuttin, no courtin…” clause in the WLB handbook..lol
By TRAVIS SMITH "aka" The Type Of BLOGGER You Want To Take To Ya Momma House"
July 27, 2007 10:35 AM | Link to this
@sexione i have been burned once or twice but i also have seen Women ask for help or something no matter how good of a job they have. I guess its a big issue for me because I have been taught to grind for what I want. No one is not going to hand you anything om this world!!! On the question you asked at 9:50, I have no problem helping my SO because i know (or i hope) she will help me. But dont go spend the car insurance money on shoes or other BS because you know Im going to be here to help you out!!(thats a no no YOU WILL BE RIDING DIRTY!!…..If they knew i was messed up and didnt offer to help we have a problem….SEXIONE My main Issue is a person who dosent handle their responsibility man or female…My credit is everything to me if a person cant handle real money they darn sho cant hand their credit. I rather have a 700 Beacon then 700 cash!!!
By M.
July 27, 2007 10:36 AM | Link to this
@ SlimOne
No I wasnt doing any of that. I just have friends that text, I talk to etc. The funny thing was there really wasnt any responses on my part. So what should I do to fix this in your opinion?
@ Tazzee
Thanks for cosigning. Im from Chicago and in the midwest, its about the TALK. The south, its the LOCKDOWN!!
By Hotlanta
July 27, 2007 10:37 AM | Link to this
Please don’t show up with your clothes in the trunk of your car after the first phone conversation trying to move in. PLEASE have a clean house. Can’t stand for a man to have a Mercedes and you go inside his house and he as a futon from IKEA or a clothspin in the Jacquar dashboard. Don’t get p** because I didn’t call you after the sex wondering where I am. I am not like a lot of women thinking because we had sex we are a couple. Because sometimes like you I am looking for a easy lay. Last but not least, please don’t be asking me what is your name during the act because I might call out the wrong name. Don’t have a name I can’t pronounce like Cleopustonywaynestevana. It will take all night to pronounce it.
By melo
July 27, 2007 10:38 AM | Link to this
@Tazzee,The ability to have sex without wanting to be exclusive does not make a woman grown and sexy I think it does.Immature(age and sex wise) women cannot handle sex, for the most part. Grown women can, in most cases because they have been thru relationships and understand the emotional connect or disconnect u speak about. They have a certain level of experience about it. You have had sex, let me see..maybe once or twice in the last couple of years..by ur admission.U do not have enough credits under ur belt. So iam not sure u can handle it without getting burnt emotionally,unlike other women here.
By Bre
July 27, 2007 10:39 AM | Link to this
Tiff I really don’t want to swing the convo in another direction nor am I sure I can keep it clean all the way through if I break it down for you. However I will try it the most basic way and the way some ladies of the night put it to me at a young age. Men are not going to ever really show a woman true emotionout right, so you have to disconnect the goods from the heart. Learn how to enjoy the ride without incorporating the two and never ask a man what he thinks afterward you should already know that. To just enjoy the ride is simply for your benefit not his. There is more power in the silence than all the words in the world many times when dealing with a real man. Now please don’t apply this to young kats, kats new in the game, or a kat thats mental is not that of a true man in every aspect. In order to get that you have to be a woman yourself. That’s as basic as I can get with it.
By GA.Man AKA "Mr. Entertainment"
July 27, 2007 10:40 AM | Link to this
Ok i just ent back and read all the posts…whewwwwww!!!
Ok so for the record you mean to tell me no one here never,ever,ever took a peep at someone’s private things
Just wondering…I mean i did
By Sexione
July 27, 2007 10:40 AM | Link to this
Slim exactly! I’m not a DinnerHo hahahahahaha! ^5^5^5
Tiff good questions!!! I’m waiting for the answers………lol
T-Mango gurl, who’s your daddy? I am busting a gut over here……whew!! And no, I don’t want to meet anybody’s kid too soon, cause you definitely won’t be meeting mine. I once had this older (much older) guy to tell me some crap about how he thinks getting to know the child should be a part of getting to know me. And how he felt that if he didn’t get to build that interest in her initially, that later on down the line he couldn’t develop interest in her. I was like “old azz man please!!, you can feel howeva you want to about that, but you will NOT get to be around my child period!* Not to mention that he was waayy to old for my taste and physically not my type. That was funny and crazy……..and he was very ornary……mind you we only had a few phone convos because i knew it would go nowhere. shaking my head just thinking about it lol
By SlimOne
July 27, 2007 10:44 AM | Link to this
Single & Luvin It LMAO! Are you one of those chicks that like to date thugs? lol I just asked because you must have been asked to buy guns on more than one ocassion to make it a rule.
Tazzee Co-sign on your 10:25 post too. Men say they don’t want us to try to change them but you made it clear that they really are doing the same thing with the sex w/o emotions deal. I suggest men that want sex-only relationships to hang around outside of a SexNympho Anonymous Group.
Kinder I second the motion to add DinnerHo to that all cuttin, no courtin clause lol
By GA.Man AKA "Mr. Entertainment"
July 27, 2007 10:45 AM | Link to this
There are things that are in plain view…i had to come back and say this…and ya’ll know we all will read it….so i think everyone has looked and done alittle snooping
i dont go thru phones and ish, but come on
By Ladylike
July 27, 2007 10:47 AM | Link to this
By Tazzee
July 27, 2007 10:48 AM | Link to this
CoCo I try to live by your first rule, but I’ve been told that it ain’t happening. Just the other day I was talking to this guy and he flat out told me that the men in my age bracket ain’t trying to be friends. He basically stated that if a guy doesn’t have anything else to do, he might hang with me as friends, but for the most part if he’s going to spend time with a female it will be with one with potential nookie in the future. Any other guys that will hang around with me are ‘pretending’ to be friends until they can break me down.
So I reiterated my desire to just have a male friend (I don’t have any) and he said he would be it - but in every communication we’ve had since then, he’s flirted with me at least once - so now I know which category he’s in, LOL.
By Gorilla O aka "Tha Code Cracka"
July 27, 2007 10:49 AM | Link to this
Goodmorning Er’body 8 more days til the meet and greet on topic one of my dating guidelines is if you call me and i dont answer, leave me a message and give me a chance to call you back. dont call 100 times back to back to back and leave a damn message everytime you call. and then i cant recieve any other messages because my voicemail is full of you saying beep: *pickup the phone, *beep: answer the phone, beep: will you please answer the phone, etc.
Travis i feel you on the checking of the phone. fortunately ive never had that experience, but if i do, ima checkmate it from the gate.
By Alvin
July 27, 2007 10:51 AM | Link to this
Bre said while looking like a pervert “can I just see what it feel likes real quick, B??!!” LOL
Good morning sista!!
TIFF HEY YOU!!
SlimOne All I can say is DAYUM to your 1023 post.
@T-Mango
while dry humping into the air near T-Mango’s desk and working up a sweat
Who’s your daddy?, Who’s your daddy? Who’s your daddy?
T-Mango is now drop kicking Alvin and Demi to Hellz
Demi waking up in Hellz: What I do?!?!
By Single & Luvin It
July 27, 2007 10:51 AM | Link to this
SlimOneHi - No, I’m not attracted to thug types. I didn’t realize this guy had a “background” until he asked me to buy him a gun, and I responded by asking why in the world he was asking me for it. Talk about a surprise. The fact that somebody had the nerve to ask me something that retarded made me list that as a dealbreaker.
By SlimOne
July 27, 2007 10:52 AM | Link to this
M Well to give you a better response I would need more details.
How long you and her have been dating…what type of relationship/dating arrangement you two have (like does she think she’s the only one) And what type things were mentioned in the messages.
Slim now considering selecting Bre to conduct Women’s Pimphilosophy 101-104 as a new WLB member
By MusingLee
July 27, 2007 10:52 AM | Link to this
Morn’in All,
Musing’s Rule: Don’t wear a sexy low cut dress with your boobs showing if you don’t want me to look.
Musing looking at boobs
Chick: Hello, my eyes are up here m/f.
Musing: Huh, ohhhh I was looking at your boobs.
Chick: don’t you know that is so rude.
Musing: Don’t you know it’s rude to put them in my face and not expect me to look.
Musing now beat’in over head, but still trying to see boobs jiggle
Musing and SO off to waste the day away…later people
By Tiff
July 27, 2007 10:52 AM | Link to this
Bre
Thank you for breaking that down for me. That’s the best explanation and the easiest to understand that I have ever gotten.
By Tazzee
July 27, 2007 10:53 AM | Link to this
melo we have to agree to disagree on that one. I don’t think it has anything to do with the number of times you’ve had sex, it has to do with knowing yourself and your limitations. If that is the case then you and Biff are basically saying you only want women that have had many men run through them because those are the only ones that can allow you to do the same.
By Sexione
July 27, 2007 10:54 AM | Link to this
Yep, Slim & Tazzee That’s exactly what it is. We are (for the most part) who we are, same for men. If they don’t want us to try and change them, why would they try to change us? One word……..SELFISH!! And the funy thing is, when you don’t conform to their rules or what they want, then you’re not (fill in the blank). Really mature people understands and appreciates each others differences, you embrace them, you encourage them, you uplift them. Anything outside of that is pure crap!! Just my opinion…
I third the motion……..lol
GAman they were talking about cell phone intrusion, not in general…..cause you know most of us have! lol
Bre so basically you learned that from some hookers? Ok, cool, I’ll just add that when that ride is no longer going your way (in the same direction you’re going), get the hellz out of the car! lmsao another bus will be along shortly! hehehehe
By SlimOne
July 27, 2007 10:58 AM | Link to this
Gorilla So did you get a chance to check it out or no?
By Hotlanta
July 27, 2007 10:59 AM | Link to this
Please do not use your nickname and you are over 30. By the time you go across the tage and get your high school diploma you should leave your nickname on stage. Please don’t say/brag that you are friends with all of your exgirlfriends. I am not a member of anyone’s exgirlfriend club. I will be checking that little blue pill on the nightstand to see if it is Viagra or Aleve. If it is Viagra I am aleaving.
By Bella
July 27, 2007 10:59 AM | Link to this
Happy Friday, everyone!
@ SlimOne: All I mean is, if you’re telling me you love me, you better not just be throwing it around. You’d better be saving up for a ring. If you don’t love me, don’t say it. (And I would not enforce this rule to other people, just to myself!) I just know too many women whose SOs tell them they love them for years, only to leave without marrying them. =(
By Mo (now known as Moeisha
July 27, 2007 10:59 AM | Link to this
Kinderbabe I will be here til Monday. Just a nice lil break chillin with the family. I have had someone go through my phone and I have never felt so violated….nor so angry!
QC Mo’s sister says thank you for the mimosa She says she may try to drop into Blogsville from time to time.
Hey SJ
T-Mango who’s you daddy?!?!?! ROTFLMAO!!! HEEEEEELLLLZ NAW!!
I may drop in on you guys later!!! Off to do some shopping…
By Tazzee
July 27, 2007 11:00 AM | Link to this
Gorilla just reminded me of another pet peeve of mine - if you call, please leave a message. Don’t expect me to call you back just because I see your missed call on my phone. The only time I do that is if I’m expecting a call - like we’re planning to meet up. Other than that I don’t even look at my missed calls list.
By Bre
July 27, 2007 11:04 AM | Link to this
Sexione No but cute however they were wise in what they wanted physically. The ones that are still living have been married 35+ years and never to my knowledge had any issues with there husbands. Instead of being taught to shy away from the physical I was taught to embrace it and there was nothing dirty about it. Don’t get me twisted there is a huge difference in being a hooker and a woman who knows what she wants and how she wants it.
Tiff Its cool, I’m not all knowing on things trust but I am comfortable with who I am first and foremost.
Hey Alvin, how are you?
By TRAVIS SMITH "aka" The Type Of BLOGGER You Want To Take To Ya Momma House"
July 27, 2007 11:04 AM | Link to this
IT’s MY BOY GORILLA O I feel ya GORILLA O…all that back to back calling is ignoring!! I also HATE people with METRO PCS they have no phone consideration i have T-mobile i have minutes that arent UNLIMATED!!!!!!
By Gorilla O aka "Tha Code Cracka"
July 27, 2007 11:05 AM | Link to this
im just really getting up to speed on the discussion. but so far i have to say to Travis….PREACH, BROTHA PREACH!!!!!
damn SlimOne, yo momma fine too?
By melo
July 27, 2007 11:06 AM | Link to this
Coco,to a man..if u say u wanna be friends first, it means u aint feeling him(in his mind). Thats why he wont want to be around. But a man will stick around sometimes, if he thinks u are sexy and beautiful…in the hope that, yes, u might break down and give it up.
A man is like a hunting lion..he will wait hoping for a weak moment on ur part. It may never come, but thats how a man’s mind works.
By Staceye
July 27, 2007 11:07 AM | Link to this
Tazee you hit the nail on the head. You try to hold off on sex because you know it’s hard to give it up with out some emotional attachment.
By Gorilla O aka "Tha Code Cracka"
July 27, 2007 11:08 AM | Link to this
i sent you a friend request too SlimOne
By QC - TGIF!
July 27, 2007 11:08 AM | Link to this
Tiff you know i got you girl! Keep in touch with me: MissQC@gmail.com
Hey Demi, Musing, GA.man
^5 Gorilla don’t keep calling me if i’m not picking up the phone, duh! can you say i don’t wanna talk to yo azz right now!
QC sipping on the last of her 2nd Mimosa….Sexione, do i need to make a “Mimosa Donation”? if so take this $20 and work it out…can i get a refill?
By Alvin
July 27, 2007 11:10 AM | Link to this
SlimOne & T-Mango on that who’s your pappy/mammy Bullshish, if the girl is really enjoy the moment. Yours or some other dudes name is coming out, regardless!!
By QC - TGIF!
July 27, 2007 11:12 AM | Link to this
Good breakdown Bre
By T-Mango
July 27, 2007 11:12 AM | Link to this
Hey Kinder, Slim, Sexione
DB #4.)If we’re going out and I share with you that the attire for the event is “cosmopolitan” or “dressy” please do not arrive dressed in a yankees cap (tilted to the side), a blazer, jeans and sneakers or Tims on your feet. What happened to a pair of nice slacks/shoes or a suit/shoes(especially if you’re a man over age 30)? Sigh
By SlimOne
July 27, 2007 11:19 AM | Link to this
Gorilla I’ve dated an older guy before and when my mom came around I heard a grunt under his breath. I guess he was thinking out loud. LOL! I think my mom is attractive. I’ll check my page when I get home…It’s blocked here at work.
By lovelyliz
July 27, 2007 11:19 AM | Link to this
I can’t stand bigots. Use the N word or other racial epithets and it’s obvious that we’ve gone as far as we will ever go.
By melo
July 27, 2007 11:20 AM | Link to this
@Tazzeeonly want women that have had many men run through them because those are the only ones that can allow you to do the same. People date for diff reasons,casually, to establish a relationship for marriage..etc. If i were a virgin and want to get married, i would probably look for same. If u aint a virgin, dont pretend to be one, like u have never tasted it,literally! I wont ask how many men have bee thru a woman, i hope u wont ask me same. I am not a virgin, so most likely the ones i wanna date have had other men inside them before. I just wont ask but i believe Biff,myself and other men on the blog are realistic about that.
By DuShawn
July 27, 2007 11:22 AM | Link to this
I must admit, I’m guilty of the female buying the gun sin. But I did it a little more creatively. I’d say something like: “Baby, you live alone, Miami is a rough city, Imma buy you a pistol. You need some protection.” ….Once we got to the gun store. *”Sweetheart, this 380 is a nice size gun for a female, Imma get this for you, but while we’re here let’s go ahead and snatch up that 357 snub nose, a 40 cal, and that AK.
By TRAVIS SMITH "aka" The Type Of BLOGGER You Want To Take To Ya Momma House"
July 27, 2007 11:23 AM | Link to this
Dang GORILLA O you getting all the myspace friend requests CAn i borrow some of yours?
By SlimOne
July 27, 2007 11:23 AM | Link to this
Alvin If it’s good to me and I feel the need to say something, some things will come outta my mouth before a name does. But either way, I’ll say your name if I want to, not because you ask me to. I’ve been in the heat of the moment and dude asked me that crazy ish…Who’s Puddy is this….and i said MINE lol!!!
By T-Mango
July 27, 2007 11:24 AM | Link to this
Alivin…you were wrong for that! LOL.
By Cemeeli
July 27, 2007 11:25 AM | Link to this
Tazze Hey ladybug. Mail call.
By Staceye
July 27, 2007 11:26 AM | Link to this
Lovelyliz who got your knicers in a bunch? Where did this come from? Did I miss something?
By TRAVIS SMITH "aka" The Type Of BLOGGER You Want To Take To Ya Momma House"
July 27, 2007 11:27 AM | Link to this
Gorilla Her Momma Fine TOO!!!!! I just checked ya page Gorilla, thats a good look!!! Imma put you in my top friends, just you and TOM!!!! myspace.com/atldec107_geezy
By M.
July 27, 2007 11:31 AM | Link to this
@ SlimOne
Well we have been involved for 5 months, but when I first met her, everything was great then a week later she sprung it on me that she was moving to NYC. After she left, there was just a lot of phone calls, texts, and visits. I guess this goes back to Bella’s topic from this week about long distance relationships. There is a ton of single women in Atlanta, so maybe I should put myself back out. What do you think slim? Do you want to be like my MTV Made Coach?
By Sexione
July 27, 2007 11:33 AM | Link to this
QC sure, you can make a donation if you’d like, but I will only accept it if everyone does. So here’s your refill (one for you and one for me, lol)………just hold on to that $20 for now……lol
I’m with y’all on that back-to-back calling. I once made the mistake of giving this young kat my # (something I never do), and his butt called me constantly until I told him to cut that ish out!!! Man………lol
Bre oh no, my fellow WLBer, I wasn’t saying you were one, ladies of the night just sounded rather wordly. Nothing wrong with knowing those who walk on the dark side…lmsao And you are right, there is a hug difference in the two.
So why it is when a woman knows what she wants and doesn’t want, if what she doesn’t want is what a man thinks she should want, she is labeled as something other than grown and sexy? I think (I know) that we can be mature, sexy, grown, bout-it bout-it, and stand firm for what you want and believe. Just because you’re not open all night without emotional ties or serving you up without commitment, doesn’t mean you’re scared or insecure or not grown and sexy………it actually takes a much more grown and sexy woman to not go with the crowd and stand her ground. Any ole tree will bend with the wind, but it takes a strong, mature tree to stand strong against the storm.
By kimmiemac
July 27, 2007 11:34 AM | Link to this
Things that were dealbreakers for me: —> Life-sized poster of a NASCAR driver on the wall of the apartment. Not judging him, but um…. No. —> Voted for Bush and is not sorry. —> Sat lazy butt on MY sofa while I spent hours on top of a ladder, spackling, sanding & priming, covered in Kilz, and then asked ME to come down and fix him a fresh drink. Dude, if you’re not going to help, then don’t help from somewhere else.
By Tazzee
July 27, 2007 11:35 AM | Link to this
melo did you read my entire post? I’m not saying that is what you want (only you truly know what you want) - I am refuting your argument that the amount of sex is what allows a woman to detach the physical from the emotional. Bre even stated that she learned that at an early age. It is something that a woman has to make a conscious effort to do. Guess what? I don’t WANT to make that detachment. That is not a sign of immaturity. It just means that I want something different. With that, I would never entertain dating a man that is looking for sex without detachment.
By QC - TGIF!
July 27, 2007 11:38 AM | Link to this
LOL@ Slimone Why do men sometimes ask who’s puddy is it? that is hilarious
By Gorilla O aka "Tha Code Cracka"
July 27, 2007 11:38 AM | Link to this
dayum SlimOne, you just put me in a bind. ive dated a few older women in my day. so i dont know if i should go ahead and put the moves on you now, or wait til i meet ma dukes and see what she workin with….please advise. lol
Travis you know you good my a couple my brotha
Tazzee thats so aggravating. its simple, leave me a message and give me a chance to call you back. dont keep calling, calling, calling. thats gonna make me not want to answer or call you back even more. and if you continue to do it your gonna wish i didnt call you back or answer ‘cause ima chomp that azz out!!!
By lovelyliz
July 27, 2007 11:39 AM | Link to this
Staceye
Isn’t this message board supposed to be about rules of the dating game?
By Sexione
July 27, 2007 11:44 AM | Link to this
Voted for Bush and is not sorry Now that is funny as crap!!!!! I can see that! lol
Staceye liz was giving her DBs (deal breakers).
By Staceye
July 27, 2007 11:44 AM | Link to this
kimmiemac you should have told him to kick rocks from the start…or came down and fixed him a hot drink and threw it in his lazy azz face! Hey well at least it’s not hot grits! He voted for Bush both times and can;t contirubute it to voting machine error or plain ole drunkeness…he should have has azz kicked (a kick for every soilder that has died in the stupid war) Whoo, got off on a tangetnt there….But that is just my opinion.
By Alvin
July 27, 2007 11:54 AM | Link to this
SlimOne same differences sis…Now every woman is different, if she is enjoying herself, she will let you know. My job is to find your zone and keep you in your zone as long as possible. I don’t ask a woman to say my name…unfortunately, my SO keep calling out my name, like that stupid a$$ cartoon of the same name.
I am thinking of choking her a little, do a skit for me
Bre I am good, just working hard to keep some folks happy, LOL
By melo
July 27, 2007 11:54 AM | Link to this
@Tazzee, and yes, Bre spelled it out in terms of what i meant about grown and sexy, maybe she can help me and u out.And on unever entertain dating a man that is looking for sex without detachment., realize that u will never find a man with the word commitment and emotionally connected written on their forehead! They will have sex with u, not knowing what the future holds. But if from henceforth u guys are still the same, he treats u good and u do the same, he will grow to liking u more and more,luving u and inviting u to his family events etc.The words luv will start coming outa his mouth more and more. Thats when he and u know, its a wrap! Dont bugg a brother just because u decided to have sex with him. It was ur decision. But i guarantee u ladies, if u do that, a man will appreciate u more. I am grown, sexy and experienced so i know. And i have puddy on the regular!!
By Je t'hommes
July 27, 2007 11:58 AM | Link to this
Afternoon all,
Previous lurker who would like to break the ice by bearing gifts to blog world. Please enjoy the Dom Pérignon Rosé. No need to pitch in. DBs: Don’t act like I’m UNE FOO FOO and start in with the tall tales… just be you. Say what you mean, mean what you say. More to come…
Also, I will go through some ones phone in a heartbeat. Just cause I’m nosey, not nsecure. And would probably ask about a couple of the names…. just to pull a card or two.