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Testosterone Tuesday
The Atlanta Journal-Constitution
Uncle! Uncle!
Yep, that’s right. The Serf is begging for mercy (albeit employing suitably masculine terminology to do so), a mere three days into the official start of the fall TV season. I know, I know, Jonas Blane (Dennis Haysbert) would be so disappointed in me. Clearly, I’m not tough enough to serve under his command in “The Unit.” Heck, I’m barely tough enough even to WATCH “The Unit” anymore.
That’s thanks to CBS’s new Tuesday scheduling strategy, which debuted last night and which really should be re-dubbed “Floyd Landis TV.” Talk about your elevated testosterone levels! It starts with “NCIS,” where the tough-as-nails Navy criminal investigators are always hunting for terrorists or missing nuclear weapons, then heads right into “The Unit,” where the super secret Special Forces operatives are always hunting for terrorists or missing surface-to-air missiles, then finishes up with the new drama “Smith,” in which a scarily proficient gang of professional criminals sandwiches major heists in between a shooting here and a high speed powerboat chase there. Bam! Bam! Bam! CBS lines the shows up and mows ‘em down like targets on a firing range. The 11 p.m. news that follows seems downright sedate by comparison (Especially if there’s a panda story. And these days, there’s always a panda story).
This isn’t the first time CBS has offered up such an action-packed night of drama. Way, way back in the fall of 1987, the network’s Wednesday night lineup started out with “The Oldest Rookie,” starring Paul Sorvino as a 50-year-old beginning cop in the big city, then segued immediately, thrillingly, into “Magnum P.I.” and “The Equalizer.” The combination was so tantalizing to Papa Serf that he used to buy a giant submarine sandwich, set up a tray table in the den and declare it “He-Man Night.” Mother Serf knew she entered the room at her own peril.
Now, suddenly, it feels like He-Man Night all over again. I’m not saying CBS doesn’t know exactly what it’s doing with this new Tuesday lineup, or that it won’t have some appeal to female viewers. All I’m saying is it should come complete with a soundtrack of Tom Hanks screaming, “Are you crying? Are you CRYING? There’s no crying in TV-watching!”
But maybe if there was a submarine sandwich …
But enough about me. What did you think of all the new and returning Tuesday night shows?
Permalink | Comments (15) | Categories: New TV
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By E. Lewis
September 20, 2006 9:09 AM | Link to this
I can’t really say anything about the CBS Tuesday night line up because after watching The Daily Show/Colbert Report on Comedy Central, I swithed over to Sci-Fi to watch Eureka. Thank God for cable networks.
By Dave
September 20, 2006 9:36 AM | Link to this
TV….Who has time for TV?
By dave
September 20, 2006 9:58 AM | Link to this
Ray Liota is wasted in “Smith”. He’s such an underratted actor, he must have taken this gig just for the bucks. Any charcter bit in films would have to be more rewarding than this tripe, if not financially, than creatively.
By it's him
September 20, 2006 10:14 AM | Link to this
Anything with Law and Order in the title gets my vote! I LOVE Criminal Intent….and Vincent D!
By jshl
September 20, 2006 10:30 AM | Link to this
Can we vote to remove ‘Who Wants to be A Super Hero’ and wrestling from the SCI-FI channel?
By Lisa
September 20, 2006 10:44 AM | Link to this
Law & Order SVU is a great show, Law & Order, CI is almost as good. I like NCIS but only if Agent Gibbs comes back. My husband likes “The Unit” but it’s a little too much for me.
House is still my favorite Tuesday night show.
By jd
September 20, 2006 11:01 AM | Link to this
I just watched ‘smith’, and was appauld with the guy who shot the two Hawaiians on the beach. Everyone has fantasies of besting the beach bullies in life - but this was so repulsive it turned me off.
And - which is more omnipotent - Michael’s tattoos, or Jack’s PDA?
By Robert
September 20, 2006 11:32 AM | Link to this
I vote to remove anything billed as “Reality TV”. The reality is that American Idull, Survivor and the copies, The Apprentice, et al, are just boring airtime filler. And, what exactly is the moral lesson on Survivor? It is ok to be a liar and a backstabber if it means you can win! TV just sucks!
By Just me
September 20, 2006 11:35 AM | Link to this
Let’s start with the cancellation of “Dancing With The Stars”, “Big Brother”, The Apprentice” and “Celebrity Duets” first. Can you say annoying? I’m waiting on “24” to come back in January. Jack is the man! :D
By American Patriot
September 20, 2006 11:39 AM | Link to this
Why are we letting Irans President and Venezuala’s President Speak at the United Nations…Someone should assinate them both….and the world would be so much better offf!!! Just post a sharp shooter outside in one of the office buildings and take them both out!!!!!!!
By joey lee
September 20, 2006 11:47 AM | Link to this
So far I like the new NCIS season so much better without Gibbs. He was such a negative wet blanket. I like him much better in retirement especially when he came back to help and actually smiled. Loved the way DeNozo stood up to him. Actually I like everyone much better this season. I didn’t watch Smith because of bad reviews but I am a big fan of Ray Liotta. I am trying hard to like all variations of Law and Order b/c it’s seemingly on everywhere all the time. I love House but the new season, I don’t know, seems to be going off the deep end already.
By Tryp
September 20, 2006 3:36 PM | Link to this
First, I would like to say that I am a hetrosexual female. I absolutely loved the CBS line-up. My husband and I are BIG fans of “NCIS” and “The Unit.” “Smith” was better than I expected, but a little too much for regular TV for me. I think it would do better on cable.
By Kevin
September 20, 2006 7:49 PM | Link to this
U want bring a show return Who line is it anyway back on Tv again…be better what have Now…I want me hoedown back n sound affects n the humor the funny lines of greg proops , colin n brad n brian style…
By mac
September 20, 2006 10:12 PM | Link to this
I’m intrigued by the concept of Smith and the execution didn’t turn me off. Virginia Madsen is in her element and Ray Liotta glides easily between doting dad/husband and master criminal. And I’m a huge fan of Shohreh Aghdashloo. There’s obviously a lot of backstory to explore and I’ll tune in at least to get some of that. OK, I’ll Tivo it because I can’t stay up that late to watch TV without being a zombie the next day. The only other new shows I’ve caught this season are Vanished and Studio Sixty on the Sunset Strip. I’m getting sucked into the mystery of Vanished. I’m not yet commiting to Studio Sixty but I’ll give it a couple more chances before I cancel my season pass.
By rd
September 21, 2006 8:49 AM | Link to this
And we wonder why our famalies are so estranged????? And our children…. are we setting a good precedent for them…… by “vegetating” on the couch? Some tv is ok….but America uses it to baby sit its’ children, as well as the adults. I am sorry….but I have a hard time finding much, if anything, socially redeeming about “network” television! And satellite tv is fast becoming the same, with the exception of educational and learning channels!!! I would love to see how America would respond socially and attitudinally…. if we could, as John Prine once said, throw the tv out the back door. How many of you have eaten dinner or supper with your children lately?????