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You asked for it: Here are some nice things about my husband for a change
Do I still have to get him a Valentine's Day present?
The Atlanta Journal-Constitution
As my husband and I were preparing to celebrate our 14th dating anniversary last month, my 4-year-old was full of questions. “Why do you love Daddy? Why did you start dating Daddy? Why did you marry him?”
Her questions gave me pause.
After 12 years of marriage, it’s sometimes hard to remember why I fell in love with this guy who comes home late, criticizes my housekeeping and knows the rosters of every SEC football team but can’t identify his child’s preschool teacher.
Around the time we were preparing for our anniversary date, I ran into one of my parents’ neighbors. She said, “I read your column every week. One week, I would just like to read something nice about Michael.”
So for my daughter, my parents’ neighbor and for the readers who have suggested repeatedly that we seek marriage counseling or just get divorced, I offer the top reasons why I fell in love with my husband and why we stay together:
He is the funniest person I know.
He is the smartest person I know. (Sometimes I wish he wasn’t such a smart-aleck. When we first started dating I was snooping around his room and found his transcript. I was shocked by his grades and SAT score. I wasn’t used to dating guys smarter than me. )
He is a snappy dresser.
He has a full-head of hair. (Although he does use more hair product than me and spends more time primping than most women I know.)
He is the cleanest man I’ve ever met. Although his obsessive-compulsive cleaning of the house annoys me - his personal cleanliness is nice. He doesn’t even smell bad after a workout.
When we first started dating, he would clean the bathroom that he shared with two roommates any time I came over. Fourteen years later, he routinely removes hunks of hair out of the bathtub drain even though he never uses the tub.
He will spend 30 minutes recapping any movie or novel that is too sad, scary or boring for me to actually sit through. Go ahead, ask me about”Angela’s Ashes”, “The Shipping News” or “The Shining.”
He’s always wanted a large German shepherd, yet he let me take in a 15-pound Shih Tzu that I found last year. And every night at midnight, he walks my prissy little dog while I’m comfy in bed.
He’s always willing to play pretend with the kids, recently turning two dish towels into a top and skirt because my daughter asked him.
He has read “Horton Hatches the Egg” to the kids so much, he can re-enact the whole thing from memory.
He and my son have their own little testosterone-driven world of football, roughhousing and race cars that I just can’t replicate.
He makes a mean grilled-cheese sandwich.
He still looks good without his shirt, and his butt still looks good in a pair of jeans. (This is true, but I didn’t actually write this. I left this computer file open for awhile, and found this sentence when I returned.)
And finally:
- He takes a public flogging more cheerfully than any husband I know.
Why did you fall in love with your spouse? (Keep it clean people - or at least keep the innuendo somewhat innocent.)
Permalink | Comments (32) | Categories: Battles between Mom and Dad
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By Theresa
February 13, 2006 09:12 AM | Link to this
Tell us your list of why you fell in love with your spouse
By jamie e.
February 13, 2006 09:30 AM | Link to this
I fell in love with my husband because he (note this list is not in any particular order)
By Theresa
February 13, 2006 10:03 AM | Link to this
Hey Jamie — very nice work — now we’ve got the spirit — My husband could work on the getting along with family portion!! He needs to be a little more polite to them.
By Julie
February 13, 2006 10:11 AM | Link to this
There are so many reasons to list!
He is: HOT!! a wonderful father, lover, and friend a good cook and housekeeper a great son-in-law he spends time w/ my family and friends a hardworker and good provider he lets me talk about his family freely :) compassionate, caring, honest, and sooo funny
He has so many more wonderful qualities, but I’ll stop so other people can post.
By tamara
February 13, 2006 10:27 AM | Link to this
My hubby has got to be in the top 10 of the world’s best. He makes and brings me coffee in bed every morning, tells me how beautiful I am even when I feel sick & look crappy, never forgets to kiss me bye when he’s leaving, extremely romantic in bed, has the biggest heart of any man I know, provides well for us financially, loves my girls like their his own and does’nt have a selfish bone in his body (sometimes he’s a little too giving though). But the number one reason I love him soooo much is because he’s my BEST FRIEND.
By Luv my huney
February 13, 2006 10:28 AM | Link to this
I love my husband because: 1. He treasures me. 2. He makes the bed every morning. 3. He will go wherever I want to go, I just have to plan it. 4. He always held a job in college, then graduated early to work at a newspaper. Now he is in law school, so we can have a better future. 5. He is good looking, and has a crazy sense of humor.
By Mrs. E.
February 13, 2006 11:24 AM | Link to this
I fell in love with my husband when, while we were dating he had asked me out. I told him that I had my 3 kids that weekend. He (a widower, father of 2)replied to me: That’s ok, I have my kids every weekend. How could you not fall in love with that!
By Confused
February 13, 2006 11:52 AM | Link to this
I think the real question is…why does he stay with you? I’ve never seen someone publish so many backhanded slaps and call them “the reasons I love him.” He must be a complete masochist, because you sound like a real pain to live with!
By J Lock
February 13, 2006 12:09 PM | Link to this
I fell in love with my husband because he waited 3 long months and a 2-hour conversation for a first kiss! I stay in love with my husband because of the kind of man he is—loving, moral, clean, and responsible, and the best father any woman could wish for!
By Theresa
February 13, 2006 12:13 PM | Link to this
Hey J. Lock — Glad you came on to comment —- when you say clean do you mean clean like his appearance or he’s neat around the house (like keeps the seat down on the toilet)?? Interesting that you said clean —- When I’m at the gym and I’m on the stairmaster next to some guy who’s stinking —I’m liked shocked because my husband just never smells that bad!— Is that important to other wives or am I nuts on that?
By TC
February 13, 2006 12:59 PM | Link to this
Theresa, I don’t mean to start a different subject on this blog (so perhaps you could officially pose this question tomorrow), but I was unable to email you directly. I have a conundrum of sorts and was hoping to get you and the other Moms out there to weigh in: Should you still buy a birthday present or other gift for say, your child’s/(ren’s) friend and/or classmate even when your child is unable to attend the party?
My husband just about went into a tizzy because I don’t think we should feel obligated to buy a gift when our children (we have two) are unable to attend the celebration. Full disclosure: our son recently had a birthday party where the child in question was able to attend and did bring a gift for our son, but our son had a schedule conflict when it came time for this child’s party. So I RSVP’d a very nice no and specifically stated why our son could not attend the birthday party. When my husband got wind that I had not planned on getting a gift for this child, he just went on a 20-minute rant! I will spare you the details, just know it was loud and ugly.
So I asked my husband whether he thought we should buy gifts for every occasion that our TWO children receive birthday invitations for? Of course he said yes. I disagree. I responded that he shouldn’t get upset when the budget gets outta whack for all this spending.
Well, I bought the child’s gift and will deliver it to school tomorrow, to end that tale.
I want to know if I am flying in the face of “birthday present” etiquette here. Am I mistaken in my view?
(Oh, I guess you probably figured out that I can’t give a positive reason why I married this person right now. Maybe I’ll remember next week.)
By Brianne
February 13, 2006 01:04 PM | Link to this
I fell in love with my husband Sean because he could quote lines from Bugs Bunny, the Princess Bride, and recite the entire Thrashers roster. When we went to pre-marital counseling the counselor asked how long we’d known each other, and he answered “two hockey seasons plus a few months…” He puts up with my crazy-busy schedule. He knows a good yard sale when he sees one, and he knows all the best places to find 50’s mod furniture. He is beautiful to look at but he’s not a pretty-boy. He can fix anything and he doesn’t treat me like a girl. He cooks more than I do. He makes me laugh even when I think I can’t. He suggested we get married by Elvis in Vegas even though he is not a fan, and even though he claims that he doesn’t like to dance he willingly and unashamedly danced at our wedding when Elvis sang “Viva Las Vegas.” He is kind, brilliant, thoughtful, considerate, and not mushy or sappy. He is a grown up man who is responsible, but can let loose and play like a child. He rocks my world and he keeps me sane.
By ToughMom
February 13, 2006 02:14 PM | Link to this
I married my high school sweetheart and have lived to realize it was the best decision I could ever make! My hubby is #1 and yes, I am extremely biased!
Top 10 reasons why I married David…. 1. I feel in love with him the moment he walked through the door. Blue eyes and hmmm nice butt! (Went home and told Mom I had met the man I was going to marry….I was 14years old). 2. He did and still does open every door for me. 3. He is funny and is a free spirit. 4. He has and still does support me in everything I do. 5. He was at each birth of our three wonderful children. 6. He is a wonderful father who loves with his whole heart. 7. He knows all of my hmmm…tender spots to make me melt like butter in his hands. 8. He calls me each day to say I love you and that he misses me. 9. He is the most caring human I know and the smartest I have ever found! 10. While he is macho and a tough man, he is the most tender man when handling my heart. He cared for me through my loss of a parent, grandparent and miscarriage. He has taken care of me all through our relationship! Here’s to 23 more years of love and happiness!!! THANK YOU HONEY!!!!
By Roslynn
February 13, 2006 02:22 PM | Link to this
My husband, Darrell, and I just recently celebrated our 10 year wedding anniversary. The reason why I love my husband is because he has the most kindest heart, but to know him you would think otherwise. I love the way he loves me despite of all my craziness at times and after ten years of marriage —- we still got our “groove” and I think that it is wonderful!
By kristin
February 13, 2006 03:39 PM | Link to this
10 Reasons That I Love Peter:
He listens to the stories that I have told him 1000 times with the same intrest as if it was the first time.
He belives in me and supports me 100% regardless of how temporary or insane some of my ideas are.
He’s hot.
4.He makes me laugh, a lot!
He helps out around the house all the time and does’nt watch football.
He truly is one of the smartest people I know.
He is kind to animals and people who are worthy of kindness.
He didn’t throw away my most favorite pair of house pants (even though they could runaway on thier own).
He loves me more than I love myself sometimes.
Most importantly After 10 years together, I can truely say that he is my best friend.
Happy Valentines Day!
Kristin
By Bianca
February 13, 2006 03:59 PM | Link to this
He makes me laugh so hard I have peed my pants.
He helps take care of my mother who has been battling cancer for 2 years and has even let her move in with us.
He lets the dog sleep in the bed with us, even though he originaly said “never”
He is my best friend.
He one fine man and levi strauss should thank him for endorsing their product.
By fk
February 13, 2006 04:26 PM | Link to this
We celebrate our dating anniversary, too…Oct. 31, 1980. My husband and I were married 19 years last November. He still makes my heart beat irregularly.
We still laugh at many of the same things that we did when we were teenagers. We’ve grown, not always at the same pace, but together, and have made a nice life for ourselves and our son. Plus, he can cook (he’s a grad from the CIA), clean & vacuum(when “asked”), gives an awesome foot massage and keeps me laughing. More often than not, he lets me win the argument. He spends at least one week of his summer vacation, and Christmas every other year, visiting my very large family. And he cooks gourmet meals for them, too. Sometimes, there can be 30 guests for dinner.
He’s a good and patient dad. He coached. He always cleaned up after the sick child, without a word or look, even though he was the one getting up for work in the morning. I’ve always been a gagger. He’s gone “driving” with our 15 year old who recently earned his learner’s permit. I’m not ready for that yet.
Our love connection was made long ago, in Sept. of 1975, he was 14 and I was 12…I know, I can’t believe it myself. When I picked the lowest line on a tree to show how much I liked him, he picked the spot way above the highest line for me. OMG! I forgot to breathe! After all these years, the tree with the lines is long gone, but he still talks about it, and my heart skips a beat.
He was always the really handsome and funny guy, with the biggest blue eyes, to whom people gravitated. I was the serious-smart-quiet girl, but also the spectator who liked to laugh. Even though he was not the student I was, he always encouraged me to do my best. That made me realize that it was okay to be serious about schoolwork and a career, but to lighten up in other areas.
He always went out of his way for me, and still does, even though I complain that the phone call still comes a bit too late when he’s not going to be on time. He was a senior in high school when I was a freshman. I thought I was going to die the few times he carried my books at school. I had to remind myself to focus on the floor ahead because my head was in the clouds. Needless to say, I turned bright red whenever he directed his attention at me. I think the blushing thing and laughter did it for him. He can still bring me back to that place in time.
There has been some drama along the way. Distance separated us thru all of the college years, and there was a break up or two, but the pull to be together has always been there.
We moved 1,000 miles away from family. We started a family of our own. Careers changed. Through it all, he helps the serious girl in me see the humor in life. He can still make me laugh uncontrollably to the point of hiccoughs.
He is still the handsome and funny guy people gravitate to at a party. Although I do partake in the activity, every so often I like to hang back and watch him. And, in the middle of everything, he still looks for me…and when he catches me watching, he smiles and I blush…and my heart misses a beat.
By Theresa
February 13, 2006 04:51 PM | Link to this
fk — you’re making me cry — that is so sweet!! and I’m so glad other people celebrate their dating anniversary too — yours is a lot longer than ours!
By Brown eyed girl!
February 13, 2006 06:32 PM | Link to this
I fell in love with my husband after almost seven hours of conversation. He was a perfect gentleman and I could see forever in his eyes. We had a long distance relationship (I was in ATL, he was in Louisville, KY) and we talked every day. After only one month of dating, I told him that we would be married and he responded with “I know”. He was the answer to the prayer of a woman who had been in a failed marriage and wondered if I would or could ever love again. What he showed me, though, was that I had never really loved before. He cares for me, he adores me, he protects me and I can’t imagine ever being without him. He cried with me when we lost (miscarried) our first child and he cried again with me when we welcomed our son. We always note the first day we kissed, the day when he proposed, and the days and hours leading up to the day we married; remembering what we were doing at that time. This year, we celebrate five years of marriage. I know to some, it may not seem like much. But for someone who’s first try didn’t last that long, it is forever. We are not a perfect pair, but we ARE a blessed pair! I love you, honey!
By janet
February 13, 2006 06:37 PM | Link to this
My husband has the most infectious smile! He is handsome and has wonderful blue eyes that are kind. He let me get the dog I wanted and he admits he can’t believe how much he loves the little dog…He carries its picture… Yes it is a little white fluffy maltese with the heart of gold and a personality to match! My husband will walk this dog proudly (or carry it if the walk is too long)He once got into it with a guy who asked him: “What sort of dog is that for a man?” He did not say it is my wife’s dog, I love him for that!!!When he buys me gifts that I think are too expensive he tells me I am worth it! He can be silly, and funny, he is smart nad passionate about everything he does, he truly is one of the nicest people I know, I cannot believe I am married to him, I know I am very lucky! There are not many of his kind out there!
By Becca
February 13, 2006 06:46 PM | Link to this
He made me laugh and he was capable of having a long deep conversation about something other than himself. He still can make me laugh. And he fixes things that I don’t know how to fix! He frustrates me but I still love him.
By Steve in ORF
February 13, 2006 07:42 PM | Link to this
Because each morning I feel his warmth and how he grabs on for that extra 5 minutes before we have to get up. How for the first year of our relationship, we were 3 hours away from each other and it was the random phone calls/emails to say hey, and they still happen. How each time when its time for that question of “what’s for dinner” he knows what I want before I even say it. And how he kicks my butt at Triominos. And how he knows that no matter how bad of a day that I’ve had, a Reese Cup and a hug will make things all better. :)
By Rose
February 14, 2006 07:44 AM | Link to this
I love it that my husband is so MALE. He’s strong and protective, but he does zillions of things to pamper me. He’s the funniest guy on the planet. Even though we’ve been married a long time (24 years today), I look nothing like the model he married, and we have a boatload of teenagers, he loves me and wants to date me all the time.
By Joe
February 14, 2006 08:02 AM | Link to this
May I speak for my fellow husbands and fathers? Thanks, Ladies, for pointing out some of the good attributes of my colleagues. Rest assured that I will show Theresa’s column to my Wife :-) Isn’t it interesting that Valentine’s day occurs 2 weeks after the conclusion of football season? Coincidence?
Also, isn’t it interesting how our seasons change. BACK THEN: My Wife and i had our first REALLY romantic evening on a mid-week Valentine’s day. Plenty of time to last minute shop and had our first bite of sushi (I didn’t make reservations and the hibachi grills were occupado!) We clumsily played with chopsticks, laughed, and enjoyed a late evening. TODAY…we have had to push back Valentine’s to Friday to schedule the sitter, accomodate work, ensure that we can rise at 5am tomorrow morning, and save money on post-Valentine’s sales (so that we can afford the Friday’s sushi) What a life!!
By Jesse's Girl
February 14, 2006 08:29 AM | Link to this
I fell in love with my husband Oct.7 1991. I was more than a little sauced at a party and got ill….violently ill. This man that I had drooled over from afar for more than a year came and took care of me. He placed me in my friend’s bed and actually nursed me that night. When any other guy at the party would have taken complete and total advantage of my diminished state…my guy held a cool wash cloth to my head. I knew at that moment that he was “the one”. After 14 years as a couple, nearly 10 of them as a married couple, and 3 children later….here is a list of reasons why you should all be very jealous…… 1. He cleans toilets. 2. He does dishes. 3. He brings me flowers for no reason…and knows what my favorite perfume is. 4. He plays barbies with our daughters….although Ken morphs into Warren Buffett. 5. He walks my dog AFTER he announces he is ready for bed. 5. He works from home EVERY time I need him to. 6. He keeps all my mental lapses a secret. 7. He sends me emails that just say ” I love you.” 8. He calls me on the phone and blasts our song over the car radio….and he sings it! 9. He knows that our dating anniversary is just as important as our wedding anniversary. 10. Our son idolizes him and our daughters want to marry someone just like him. I love my husband.
By Amy Carlson
February 14, 2006 09:57 AM | Link to this
Theresa, I have never posted before, and just started reading your blog when we received your Christmas card letter. What a joy it is to read about your sweet husband, and wonderful family. Mike (does anybody call him that anymore?) was my best friend in high school, and I vouch that he is hysterical, kind hearted, and way too smart for his own good! I wish you both a very happy Valentines Day- and please tell him, from me, that he has definately married out of his league. :) Amy Carlson
By Julie
February 14, 2006 10:20 AM | Link to this
I am so glad you posted this question yesterday. I think it made us fall in love w/ our husbands all over again. When life comes at you full force, sometimes you forget the little things, this was a great way to go back and remember. Thanks Theresa!
By sulah
February 14, 2006 12:54 PM | Link to this
He was funny, he was sweet, he was kind. But then a drunk driver crashed into his car in 2002 and now he is but a memory.
By Theresa
February 14, 2006 12:56 PM | Link to this
Hey Amy — It’s so nice to hear from you! I just called Michael at the office to read him your comment — he was shocked!! He says everybody says he married out of his league -although I don’t think he believes it!— I think the only person that still calls him Mike is his brother — We hope to talk with you soon! Take care! Theresa
By tamara
February 14, 2006 01:06 PM | Link to this
Sula, I’m sorry for your loss but please try to go on for in this wonderful life you shall meet the wonderful man over again.
By Amy
February 14, 2006 02:17 PM | Link to this
I fell in love with my husband because he’s my tall, dark and handsome stranger. He’s smart, very funny, and incredibly thoughtful. He buys me flowers anytime I’m out of town; he cleans up the house for my return; he loves my parents; our kids adore him because he’s so patient with them; he loves to cook; he takes time to help my friends with their problems; he gets involved in my interests and he is cute, cute, cute. But, the biggest reason I love my husband is because he puts up with me and for some reason is crazy in love with me.
By Diane
February 14, 2006 07:09 PM | Link to this
My husband, John and I just celebrated our 12th wedding anniversary, our 14th engagement anniversary and our 15th dating anniversary (and yes, he remembers all these dates too!) The reasons I fell in love with him and still love him now… · He has the most infectious laugh. · He has a heart of gold and will do anything to help family and friends. · He loves kids and they love him. · He goes out of his way to make me happy. · He makes me laugh when I want to cry. · He helps me around the house with the cooking, cleaning, laundry, etc. · He’s been there to hold my hand in the bad times and celebrate with me in the good times. · He gives me flowers just because. · He gets along with my family and even likes to vacation with them! · He’s my knight in shining armor. · He made December 4, 1990 my last worthless evening!