Jennifer Lopez is finally talking about the very public end of her engagement to actor Ben Affleck almost 15 years ago.
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The popular entertainer recently sat down for an interview with Vanity Fair and revealed she put great pressure on herself to “do something great all the time,” after becoming the first Latin actress to make $1 million from a role in a film.
She said believed she would find success with her 2003 film “Gigli,” which she starred in alongside then-fiancé Affleck, but the film was a major flop at the box office.
“I was eviscerated,” she told Vanity Fair about the difficult time following the film’s release.
“I lost my sense of self, questioned if I belonged in this business, thought maybe I did suck at everything.”
Related: Jennifer Lopez and Alex Rodriguez detail their relationship in Vanity Fair profile
Soon after “Gigli’s” release, Lopez and Affleck’s engagement ended in a very public way.
“My relationship [with Affleck] self-destructed in front of the entire world. It was a two-year thing for me until I picked myself up again,” she said.
Now, Lopez is back on top of her career and has found love again. She was married to Marc Anthony, with whom she shares two children, but, after her divorce, she met baseball hunk Alex Rodriguez, who she gushed about in the article.
“I understand him in a way that I don’t think anyone else could, and he understands me in a way that no one else could ever. In his 20s, he came into big success with the biggest baseball contract [at the time]. I had a No. 1 movie and a No. 1 album and made history. We both had ups and downs and challenges in our 30s, and by our 40s we’d both been through so much. And more importantly than anything, we had both done a lot of work on ourselves,” Lopez told Vanity Fair.
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And, Rodriguez is equally in love with her. He told the publication his girlfriend is “happiest at home, in pj’s, eating chocolate-chip cookies with friends.”